Ghost of Ramonas Past

Chapter One

Imagine, every night and day, you're mind is against you. Making you think everything that goes wrong in you and everyone close to you's life is your fault. That is what happens everyday, in the life of Ramona Williams.

"Hey Ramona! What did you get on the test for Science?" A short girl with shoulder length Blonde hair, says over-enthusiastically as she skips over to Ramona. "Oh, hey Janie. I got a B, a straight, flat B. Not a Plus, not a Minus, just a plain old B." In an annoyed, disappointed tone Ramona looked to her friend who was grinning ear to ear, her face was a soft creamy colour, with soft cheeks, inviting blue eyes and the longest lashes Ramona has ever seen in her life.

"That's a great mark!"

"I can do bet-"

"I know you can do better," Janie mimicked as she rolled her eyes, "but guess what! Guess! Okay if you aren't going to guess I'll tell you!"

"Oh do tell, Janie." Ramona replied sarcastically.

"He asked me out!"

"Who?"

"James, silly! He asked me out and I said, guess, oh no don't guess, I said yes!"

Janie was the complete opposite of Ramona. Janie was all about boys and not caring about school work, all about the gossip but she was like a personal councillor for almost all of her friends, especially Ramona. Ramona on the other hand, complete introvert, stayed away from the gossip and could care less of others problems, she could hear people but she never truly listened, she couldn't care less about boys and more for school. She wasn't always like this though, she used to be fun and outgoing, the life of the party, that was until the night her bestfriend Jordan said goodbye for the last time.

Confused, all Ramona could do was stare at her friend who was blankly waiting for her to speak. In the most up-beat attitude she could find she managed to mumble, "Thats great, Janie. I'm so happy for you!" With that, the two hugged as Janie held Ramona at arms length jumping up and down squealing like a 5 year-old girl who just got a pony for their birthday. As the two girls started on their way home, a deep-husky voice came booming from behind them. "Janie! Janie wait up!" It was James, the only male cheerleader who was straight. The typical cheerleader guy; always happy, perfect golden brown hair and of course, always in uniform. As he and Janie greeted in a warm inviting hug, they looked deep into each others eyes, his cold green eyes sparkling brightly while her ice blue eyes gleamed. Romy knew this look all to well, they were in love. Now, the trio made there way to their homes. The lovebirds hand-in-hand, were all having a conversation. Although, Ramona could hear them she wasn't truly listening. Her mind was elsewhere, distracted.

"I'm sorry Romy, I just can't take it anymore. You know I love you, goodbye." As those 15 little words repeated themselves in Romys head, she remembered it was Jordan's 1 year death anniversary in 2 days. Jordan was your typical boy-next-door. Could never do wrong, always happy and joyful. Greeted everything with a smile. Everyone loved Jordan, but he was extremely fond of Ramona. On his first day at Kavangah Elementary, he was trying to gain the reputation of being tough and he could get any girl, so he spotted Ramona and went straight up to her and claimed her to be his by putting his arm around her, that she could handle but the moment he leant in for a kiss. Well, let's just say, he probably would never of had children.

Days went past and one day, Jordan was sent out of class when he spotted Ramona roaming the halls by herself, he always seemed to see her roaming around by herself. He took this opportunity to go up and thoroughly apologise for his disgraceful, appalling actions. Ever since they were insuperable, the best of friends. He gave her the nickname 'Romy' as she was always roaming the halls by herself, and it also just happened to be a nickname that matched her given name.

The night Jordan, or Jordy as Romy called him, died, was a night dear Ramona Williams would never forget.

*BZZZ BZZZ* *BZZ BZZ* Ramonas phone was going off the hook! She looked down and saw the Name JORDAN pop up, she ignored it. *BZZ BZZ* *BZZ BZZ* Jordan, again. After hanging up a 5th time, she finally decided to answer.

"Hello?" Romys voice tired.

"Romy, it's Jordan." His voice shaky and low.

"I know, what's up?" She said sounding worried

"I'm in trouble" he said worriedly. This should have been a HUGE tip off that something wasn't right, Jordan was never in trouble where he felt the need to call Romy until she answered. Although, she was too caught up in her own world to realise.

"What's up?" She replied simple

"I don't think I can handle it anymore.. All the people, all the abuse, the fights." His voice was shaky, almost inaudible.

"Oh Jordy, hang tight I'll come over later." She said hurriedly wanting to end the conversation. She was meant to be going to the party of the guy she liked, Benjamin Brownlee, the oldest in her grade. He invited her personally, wanting her to go, so she had to right?

"Romy, please I need you now, I don't want to do something we both'll regret." His voice longing and needy, "Jordy, hang tight for a few hours, I've just got to go to this party and I'll be right round!" With that she hung up her phone and started getting ready for the party, completely putting the conversation she had not long ago, way at the back of her mind.

"Ramona? Ramona! Snap out of it?" Ramona comes back to reality, Janie and James both staring curiously down at her with wide eyes and and pupils small. "What on earth was that? You were with us then you just started sobbing, and now look at you," James began. "You're on the ground a lumpy mess." Janie finished for him. "I'm terribly sorry, I'm fine." She said as she stood up, brushing herself off. "What's wrong Romy?" There goes Janie, saying the name. Hot tears threatening to gush out of her eyes, she tries pushing them back in but they're too strong, and in full flow they just gush out. "1 year! No one cares and it's been 1 year! A whole year in 2 dam days!" She said shakily. Her voice ragged but audible. "Oh Ramona, I'm so sorry." As James and Janie hugged her she brought up the last thing she remember saying to Jordan, 'if you do this, I'll hate you forever.' Every day, for 363 days, she has regretted saying that. She doesn't hate him, she misses him. She wants him, needs him, more than anything she loves him.

"Ramona, I'm only one block, one call, one text, one care drive away! If you need me or just want to to talk, I'm here. Okay? Love you." Janies comforting words just going in one ear and out the other. Ramona nods in agreement, not hearing a word. As she walked inside her home, her mum has started cooking dinner, the aroma hitting her like a slap to the face. One deep breath in, her favourite, Spaghetti Carbonara. For the first time all day, she smiles as she runs and greets her mum, not wanting to let go, "I love you mum, you know that?" she says into her mums hair. "Oh honey, what's wrong?" Worry stricken all over her face, she knows something's up. "In two days it's been a year, two days mum." She can't take it any longer so she rushes to her room. Slamming the door she jumps into her bed and just cries and cries into her pillow. 5 minutes, 10 minutes maybe even hours, Romy has just been lying down sobbing. She misses Jordy like crazy.

As her eyes widen, she sits quickly up, an idea has sprung in her mind. She grabs a pen and some paper and starts furiously writing.

'To Jordy,

I miss you so much, I cannot express to you how sorry I am. I regret everyday saying 'I will hate you forever' I didn't mean it, I just thought it would change your mind. Why did you have to go and leave me? Why? I just wish you were here still with us, with me. We're best friends for petes sake! How could you?! Suicide is the most selfish thing anyone could ever do, and you went along and did it! Didn't you? Didn't you?

Here I go again, rambling on with something I'm going to regret everyday, for the rest of my life, again. I just wish I hadn't of been so ignorant and caught up in my own little world and instead been a good friend to you and come in your time of need. If it were me, you would have dropped everything and come to my aid. I on the other hand was too selfish.'

She continued writing until she could right no more. Her hand was all cramped and she couldn't move her wrist. She was tired, tired of crying all afternoon.

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