Just another picture to burn

Prologue

Oswald felt pathetic as he drank in the dark of his own home, while Fish and his new freak family slept peacefully. Oswald had never been a man who thought much about regret, he found it a useless emotion that was much better channelled to more productive things like revenge, but right now he was consumed but with each sip he found his eyes kept drifting to the mutilated portrait and the obscene garish green question mark obscuring the image and his failed first foray into love.

Ed had known what that portrait had meant to him, it was both his legacy and an attempt at compassion, yet he had felt no regret in desecrating it. He took pride in the act. He had claimed it for The Riddler. Oswald burned with embarrassment and guilt as he looked at the symbol for what had been his pride and joy, his empire and his best friend. So lost in his own thoughts Oswald didn't hear Fish approach until she sat next to him.

Oswald startled at Fish's compassionate words"Oswald... Mama's here." the rare showing of kindness in her eyes. Unable to resist the pull of comfort and acceptance Oswald twisted around and collapsed against her chest and cried. Cried the way he had wanted to since the moment he woke up in Ivy's bed, injured and alone, and had realised the truth. Everything that had happened hadn't been a nightmare. Fish held him close and hushed his hiccups and retched breathes as he poured his emotions out.

Eventually he quieted and his breathing returned to normal. Taking a jagged breath he raised his head to look up, fearful of seeing judgement and disdain for his weakness... Except all he saw was Fish looking down with a warm smile, acceptance and concern her only emotion.

"Now, will you tell mama what happened? I know it has something to do with that boy. The one I found you with"

Oswald averted his eyes and swallowed nervously "Ed was... He was my best friend. No one has ever cared for me the way he did, other than my mother... but I was selfish. I've always been selfish. I know it and I have never hid it, you know that far better than anyone, but for the first time I feel ashamed. I couldn't share him, so I lost him. I ruined the best thing I ever had due to my own stupidity. I deserve all that happened, I just never expected it would hurt this much"

Fish tisked "I know there is more to it, don't lie to me boy"

Oswald gave a strangled laugh "Yes... But it hardly matters." Fish continued to look expectedly at him, an eyebrow arched in place of her questions "Fine!" he snarled "I fell in love with him" he felt his chest tighten with barely held in emotion "I was even fool enough to believe he would love me back." taking a shuddering breath Oswald sighed "He made it clear that could never happen, before shooting me and leaving me for dead in the frigid waters by Gotham's docks." Oswald looked defeated as he stared blankly at the floor and muttered "Happy?"

Fish reached over and gripped him by the jaw, turning him towards her and refusing to allow him to break her gaze, and snarled "No. I hate that that fool hurt you. I want to tear him apart with my bare hands. You, Oswald Cobblepot, do not need some man who cannot recognise your worth. You are powerful, intelligent and ruthless. What person could compare when held against your accomplishments."

Oswald looked back at her, the tears burning his eyes, and let out a bitter laugh "Well, he found someone... and I killed her. I couldn't bare to see him so happy... not with her, it felt like daggers tearing at my insides."

Fish pulled him into her arms, burying his head into her shoulder "That's what we do my sweet boy, it's how we are made. In Gotham happiness is rare and we will kill for it." running her hands over his back in a soothing motion "You acted as you were made to do. He is an idiot not to have expected as much." pulling back back she smiled at the shocked awe on Oswald face "I also don't need to have met this woman to know she was nothing compared to you. From one look at that boy I can say with certainty that he, like most men, is lead by his cock and was walking into his own ruin by choosing some empty headed Gotham trash, with a pretty smile and pert tits, over you."

Oswald couldn't help but laugh at her description of Isabelle and Edward. She wasn't wrong. How he missed this woman. She was his greatest rival and mentor rolled into one. He would not be the man he was today if not for her lessons.

Fish grinned "I see that made you smile. I was right wasn't I?"

Oswald lips twisted into a impish smirk "She was the spitting image of the ex-girlfriend he murdered... well after killing her boyfriend first"

Fish barked a harsh laugh "And he thinks to judge you? The hypocrisy "

Oswald good humour evaporated "I knew he would have killed her too, but I couldn't wait and watch him with her. I also could watch how it would have broken him if he did it a second time"

She gripped his hand tight "Your better off without him"

They stayed there for some time, laughing and commiserating, before Fish encouraged him to get some sleep "You'll need your energy for tomorrow" Oswald just smiled and nodded. Despite everything that occurred, after his conversation with Fish, he felt stronger and the weight of his regret appeared to have lightened significantly.

On his way out he found himself heading towards the mutilated portrait, which had been his focus and reminder of all his pain before Fish had appeared "I think I will have Bridgit burn this before we leave "nodding sharply "Yes, and new one will have to be commissioned, of our family, once we control Gotham."

After tomorrow the pain of the past will be burnt away and Gotham reclaimed for the freaks.