𝐒𝐞𝐥𝐟 𝐂𝐚𝐫𝐞

Building Confidence

con • fi • dence
- a feeling of self assurance arising from one's appreciation of one's own abilities or qualities

[How to be confident]
• Don't let others decide for you. Your strength lies in your own decisions so don't let others take control of you. I'm not saying to disobey and be a rebel for the rest of you life, I'm just saying that you have to have the last word in your life decisions. Be someone who has their own opinions instead of letting people decide for you. You have to have a little bit of character. When you let others decide for you, you don't really have anything to speak up for yourself and it shows that you're too lenient with people. Have a stronger sense of self. Know you're own path.
• Step out of your comfort zone. The more familiar you are with uncomfortable things, the more self assured and informed you are on new situations. It also helps build a stronger sense of character. Go out in the real world, do things that you normally wouldn't do. Express yourself bolder but still yourself, go order your own food—do something that will help you familiarize with the outside world.
• Take care of yourself. By taking care of yourself, it makes you feel a little better. Buy some new clothing, do a face mask and drink some water. When you're comfortable with who you are and how you present yourself to the world, it shows that you're not afraid to express the best sides of yourself.
• Set goals and achieve them. Confidence is built off focusing on the good we do. The more you challenge and achieve, the more you believe you are capable of doing anything and that itself gives confidence. Often when we accomplish something, we begin to pay attention to our accomplishments giving us confidence in our abilities. If you do it constantly, you'll trust yourself in facing any challenge and breaking through your anxiety.
• Dress nicely. When you dress a certain way, you are expressing a certain part of yourself. To dress nicely, you are visually showing that you are confident and even influences the way you feel about yourself. It also shows that are are comfortable in your skin which is a key part of confidence.
• Affirmations. Every morning have a cup of your favorite drink, turn on your playlist and start writing positive affirmations and repeating them, say them out loud so you can hear yourself. Journaling is like physical meditation so by understanding yourself, doing anything you want like achieving a goal, or repacking bad habits with new habits. It helps a lot into being confident.
• Stop comparing yourself. No matter what you'll never be that person. Comparing yourself deteriorates your self esteem. You are you and you have to learn to embrace that and once you understand who you are, you can improve from that point on.
• Be passionate about your hobbies and do what you love. The more comfortable you are with what you like, the more easier it is to express yourself. Don't feel ashamed of what you like no matter how different it is. It's about understanding and empowering yourself rather than fitting in with what others think about your passions and hobbies. The more you get to know yourself, the more you feel self assured and confident in the world.
• Start believing in yourself. Believing in yourself is the root of self confidence. When you believe you will win, believe you will get that job or believe in anything, you are opting for a positive outcome. Believing is what encourages you to erase your doubts and insecurities. It's very important that you believe in what you do.
• Do the right thing. Confident people are always constantly evolving into being their best selves. The more you do the right thing, you're going to be prouder of who you are.
• This is a super underrated piece of advice but you have to be willing to put in the effort. Confidence is not just trained from actions and a positive state of mind, it's the willpower that allows you to do all that. You have to be willing to work on being confident and soon, you'll manifest it. You have to make the conscious choice of self improvement and confidence.

[Actions to make yourself more confident]
- Groom yourself & dress nicely
- Smile more. Usually when we feel insecure, it's harder to express emotions and expressions without feeling awkward. Smiling invokes both a feeling of positivity and a way to work on expressing your self.
- Think positive thoughts or recite affirmations & mantras (look to my law of attraction chapter)
- Make yourself the positive influence people want to see in this world. Often times that mindset will allow you to make actions that inspire others, showing you're confident enough to do what's right.
- Think things through before you act. Be prepared. Self assurance is one of the hardest things to build. You have to trust yourself. Often times, the more you believe in yourself, the more confident you are.
- Keep a straight posture.
- Be self assertive. Raise your hand in class, say no when you really need to, step up if there's something wrong, join conversations, be the first to do something.
- Build character instead of being someone else. There's nothing better than being authentic when it comes to confidence.
- Accept losses and move on. See failure as a room to grow instead of beating yourself down/being insecure of your abilities. The only thing you can do is learn from your mistakes and keep improving yourself.
- Focus on finding solutions to the problem instead of procrastinating until the answer is found.
- Be more active and open around others. Encourage yourself to interact more.
- Stop touching your face or fidgeting. It shows signs of anxiousness or insecurity.
- Stop being self deprecating and start empowering yourself. Don't make self deprecating jokes.
- Embrace your differences. It teaches you to become more happy with yourself.
- Don't compare yourself to others, it's toxic and hurts your ego. Stop social media for awhile if that's the cause.
- Believe in yourself. Always have that mindset to believe in yourself. Confidence resolves around belief.

[Things that show a lack of confidence]
- constant self deprivation or comments about your look
- comparing yourself
- wearing things that make you feel uncomfortable
- not living in the moment (constant overthinking)
- quiet talking and mumbling
- hunched posture
- not trying new things
- crying about your failures instead of learning from them
- not being decisive about your choices ex. overthinking if you're blending in, being unsure of the situation, etc

[How To Speak With A Little More Assertiveness & Clairity]

[How To Be Less Asocial]
- Smile more! People are attracted to happy people and it shows a level of confidence.
- Get off your phone and socialize.
- Speak more loudly and clearly.
- Be the first to initiate conversations or start things. If you don't want to, find ways to add on in the conversation.
- Participate in class activities.
- Get out of the house and go to new places.

[How To Not Be Shy]
- Don't accept it. Once you get too comfortable with that label, you start to doubt and give up hope. So change you mentality and stop telling yourself you're shy even if you are. Because if you want to do something about it, you got to stop doing the thing that's kept you shy in the first place which is labeling yourself.
- Meditate a lot. Whether it's writing something down or just questioning yourself while sitting outside with calm gray skies, it's something that calms you down and let's you focus on yourself more which is good for understanding yourself and your life. And when you start to understand yourself, you'll know where to improve.
- Surround yourself with social & outgoing people. You usually reflect the personalities of the people you hang out with because it's just a subconsciousness for us to mimic actions that they do.
- Start experimenting. Be a more open minded person and go out of you comfort zone to try new things. It makes you more less afraid of change and the unknown.
- Find or do something that makes you happy. Everyone is comfortable with the things that make you happy. The more happy we are, the less we focus on how scared we are to interact with people and the more we enjoy looking forward in life.

[My References]
If you want to understand how to build your confidence more, I suggest checking out YouTube channels like Charisma on Command. They helped me become a more self assured and understand individual. Self improvement videos are fun to watch because not only are you constantly finding ways to improve yourself, but you're learning something new and even understanding how we human beings work.

Note: You have nothing to lose stop being afraid of failure. You have room to grow and while you're still young, it's ok to make mistakes. That's how you learn. Confidence is hard to achieve and takes time. You're doing great bb :D