Temporary Lust

Prologue

I'm Troy. When I'm confused, I turn to God. He's obviously the best guy to want help from. Whenever my issues resolve themselves, I know it was Him who helped me; whenever they don't work out, I know it's all part of his plan.
     I say He's the best guy to talk to but He's really the only one I can talk to. As a homeschooled kid with parents who never seem to understand or approve no matter how many times I explain, finding anyone to talk to is tough. I could talk to my sister Lacy, she's just two years younger than me, but we don't have much of a bond. I try to ignore my parents yelling at her but it's not very discreet. They openly call her a mistake but I try to cover my ears and pretend nothing is wrong; then I pray. I pray that the yelling will stop and we can all get along.
     Things weren't like this before my mother married my step dad. Lacy, my mother and I would go to church every Sunday and get along. We don't know each other anymore. Mother overlooks Lacy and calls me the 'Good Egg' but that's really the nicest way to call somebody your favorite. I don't want to be the favorite, I don't want there to be a favorite. I want us to be a normal boring family that does normal boring family things. So in the moments between everything rushing as I button the last few buttons on my shirt, I pretend for a moment that everything is like it was before dad died.
With my shirt buttoned and tucked in to dress pants, I go to church where I sit in the front pews far away from the other teenagers in the back who laugh and play. I would love to be like them but I'll settle to be me, good Catholic me.