forgetful daisy

prologue

I still remember the look on his face when Dr. Lim broke the news that he had dementia. The complete and utter sadness that was shown in his glassy porcelain eyes, and the way he looked at Dr. Lim pleadingly; as if asking for a cure. There was none. We all knew that. All we could do was hope, and pray-even though He despised any and all gods. He was, no, is my everything.

We had been married for 5 years by now. Yoongi was 31 and I turned 32 in December. Those of you avid fans of my novels may probably be wondering how two gay men were able to marry in Korea, we weren't. The laws in Korea stayed strict, so obviously we eloped to Australia and stayed there for a couple months before moving back.

The sole reason for the doctor visit in the first place was because Yoongi had bumped his head and we were worried he might've gotten a concussion. It seems to have been way worse than that, I suppose.

The few weeks after his diagnosis, and it seemed as if nothing was ever wrong. Notice how I said few weeks. Once it hit a month, Yoongi was asking me simple, yet concerning, questions.

It started with, "Baby, do you remember my moms phone number?" which didn't surprise me, to say the least, since Yoongi never made the time to memorize numbers other than mine, his, and his younger brother Jeongguk's.

Next, it was, "Babe, can you help me in here?" I hadn't thought anything of it, sometimes Yoongi pulls pranks on me and makes me walk in on him naked just so we can make love. That wasn't the case, this time.

There my lovely daisy of a boyfriend stood, his shirt completely buttoned wrong and his tie, somehow, tied into a complete double knot. I remember having to cut the tie off and call into work for him for health reasons. I was so afraid he'd be on his way to work and end up on a street that he would have remembered if he didn't have dementia, but forgot because his brain was messing with him.

The last and final straw, that almost brought me to tears. "Baby Hyung, did you warsh th dithes? They are nod out on th drying paper." I hurriedly got up and went into the kitchen to find Yoongi standing by the counter, his bottom lip slotted between his teeth. I walked up to him and looked into his eyes and asked, "baby, you helped me put them away about half an hour ago, don't you remember?"

Yoongi shook his head and looked down, twiddling with his fingers. I sighed and used my thumb and index finger to lift his chin up to meet my gaze. He searched my eyes for something, disappointment maybe, but there was nothing but love.

"I love you, Kim Yoongi. There isn't anything in my heart for you except for love." I had whispered softly. Yoongi nodded his head and leaned forward to catch my lips in his.

That was the first time he had cried while kissing me. The first time he clutched onto me as if I were his lifeline.

I would give anything to take his place. To take away his confusion and his frustration.

But I couldn't.

That day, we spent cuddled together. Him sitting on my lap, facing me, with his head in the crook of my neck as I finalized some financial things in order to support the both of us since Yoongi couldn't work any longer.

This was only the beginning