Somehow (Bon Jovi)

Somehow

Well...I was depressed one night and I wrote this. You're welcome. Inspiration www.rockfic.com/viewstory.php?recid=9770

Im the only one.

The last remaining member of the band.

I miss the four of you so bad.

Hugh, your bass playing that could shake the entire stadium with the deep notes.

Tico, your drum playing that must use up so much energy peforming for hours each night.

Richie, your fingers dancing on the fretboard at speeds that few people can reach and sound good.

Jon, your singing that could make anyone smile, cry, any emotion to fit with the song, along with your simple guitar playing to warm a soul.

The four of you were buried together, we thought you'd like that. Bon Jovi is done, I lost the four people that mean the world to me.

People are still trying to help me cope, I used to make jokes constantly but now I barley speak and when I do I speak in monotone.

I place flowers on each of your graves. I will never forget waking up in that hospital room and the doctor telling me that three of you had died.

Hugh, Tico you were killed because of the head on impact of the collision.

Richie, you made it through the first two nights, dying on the third at exactly midnight they said.

Jon, you were still alive when I woke up. I had been out for 3 months. You survived 2 months past your 45th birthday, making you in a coma for 8 months. I visited every day and the day you died. I was there. I remember it vividly. The heart moniter flatlining. The doctors rushing in, trying to make your heart beat again while I watched. Tears flowing from my eyes when I realised I was the last one of the band.

I should have died too. I shouldn't be the last member remaining. I should be up there with you.

I kneel in the middle of your four graves, between Jon and Richie. Tears falling onto the grass. Its been nearly a year since I lost the final one of you four. Its been over a year and a half since I lost myself. I am now 45, Jon you would be 45 too now. Richie you would have been 48, Tico 53 and Hugh you would be 58.

I miss you all so much, I visit your graves everyday.

I have lost my music, I can't play my keyboard with tears welling up in my eyes. Sometimes I let them fall as I play one of our songs. I cant sing along because I would choke on my own tears. I can't live a proper life without you guys.

You guys were parts of my soul. When a part of your soul is lost... You are lost. I stand up and look at the four tombstones. The words I have memorised:

"John Francis Bongiovi Jr. Beloved husband, father, friend, musician. 1962-2007 Will be missed."

"Richard Stephen Sambora, Talented guitarist who was loved by many. 1959-2006. Goodbye."

"Hector Juan Samuel Torres, Drum player with rhythm forever, 1953-2006. Will be missed by many."

"Hugh John Mcdonald, beloved husband, champion bass player, loved by many. 1950-2006." Those words echo in my brain as I walk away.

I will miss you guys more than anything. I may never recover from this. Days, weeks, months, years even, will go by. I will have noone to talk to. I have tried to open up to others only to close back up again. I should be there with you, I even divorced my wife.

If I was with you up there I wouldnt be dying inside every night. I need you guys back.

Please come back to me.

Somehow.