Being Let Go

"So as of today we will not require you to carry out your duties and your systems access will be removed this afternoon." That was the sentence that stung him the most. Just yesterday he has been important, essential to the profitability of the firm. Now he was old news, the next person to say "I used to be a broker". How the fuck had that happened?

He had worked in The City since he moved to London twelve years ago and had shown both hard work and ability to get onto the swaps desk. Like most South Africans he was naturally self-confident, competitive and hard minded – traits that served him well on his way up. He was also very able to live the lifestyle. Drinking late and turning up to work early was not a problem for him, he could shrug it off. This was an essential skill even after regulation had increased over the past few years and "entertaining" was being scrutinised more closely.

But now what? They had binned his entire business line so it wasn't like there was an easy move internally and with the COVID-19 thing happening, there was nothing going on anywhere else either. So he was now a nobody, like all the other useless bastards he had seen come and go over the years. That was the worst part for him. Money was fine, the redundancy pay would cover him for a while. It was the fact that he wasn't essential, wasn't needed, wasn't good enough to be kept on.

Working from home meant it wasn't a long walk to find her downstairs. "They are shutting my desk down", he said, "I get paid for three months and then get a check, but basically I don't work there anymore." She was nice about it, of course she was, but it was obvious she was terrified about what this meant for the future. She was a worrier, especially since the little one had come along. She just wanted safety and security, which working as a broker both provided and didn't in the sense that the money was good but the lifestyle was a circus. She hated that he so badly needed the success and the stature, although she'd never admit it out loud. She also knew this would make him fucking miserable.

That night he drank pretty much everything that was in the house. The gin he had been given for his birthday, the beer he had bought for the weekend, and the red wine he always had in the rack. He sat downstairs by himself pissed and frantically looking through Linkedin for jobs. Nothing was right and he knew in this market he wouldn't get anything anyway. The whole country, the whole world, was at a standstill because of the virus.

There was something nagging him though, a thought in the back of his head. It had been there for a couple of years but he had ignored it. Maybe he wasn't a ruthless city bastard at heart and should think about doing something else. No, he was.

The next few days were like weekends except without the freedom to do anything. Lockdown was in full force so there was no going out of the house except for exercise and shopping. The shopping meant he was able to get more booze which wasn't just good, it was essential. He repeated that first night for more than a week. Once the family was in bed the drinking would pick up and the various job finder apps would take a beating. Every one that was unsuitable was another boot into the spleen of his pride. He wasn't fit to do anything. All the exams, years of experience, fuck all. Just another former broker who would end up at some estate agent or recruitment firm. All his previous success in sport, with girls, in business, in studying, was worth precisely nothing now. He was worth precisely nothing now and it was fucking embarrassing.

The COVID-19 pandemic has been big news since it led to the shutdown of a whole Chinese province in February. Now it was all through Europe with Italy and Spain seemingly out of control. It was growing fast in the US, too, with cases and mortalities going through the roof. Markets and economies were getting killed all over the world and people were losing jobs everywhere. At least they were losing theirs for a real reason and not just because their business was no longer worth keeping, he thought, with a bitterness that even shocked himself.