Wicked Little Town

We'll be okay... right?

"You don't have to say anything," Jug gently knelt down next to Betty as she sat in her chair, "I do. I'm sorry." He said earnestly, looking into her eyes

Betty looked down at him, and seeing that little glimmer in his eyes made her feel like weeping. She just broke his heart, she tore it into a million pieces and stomped all over what they had. She felt disgusted with herself, kissing Archie, what was she thinking? This man is the love of her life, why was she conflicted?

"Jug," she choked out, "it's okay."

He shook his head, "No it's not. I shouldn't have been as ticked off as I was that you had faith in me."

She shook her head and forced a smile, knowing deep down he should be hating her right now. Their eyes turned to each other's lips and they leaned in. It was a tender kiss, that she wanted to sink into, but it was wrong. Everything was wrong. But she kept the tears locked away, and tried to not let him see what was going on.

She sucked in a sharp breath and looked into his eyes again. "You okay?" He asked.

It stung her, she wasn't okay, they weren't okay. She froze and her face fell.

"Betty?"

Her eyes started welling with fear and disgust for herself. This was not happening.

He raised his brow, asking again.

She looked away, briefly glaring at the picture of her and Archie as kids and then found the one of her and Jughead recently. She had to tell him.

"I-I need to say that I'm sorry..."

He effortlessly turned her chair to face him and grabbed her shoulders lightly, "What happened, Betts?"

"I'm... disgusted with myself," she breathed, "I don't know what even happened. It's all my fault." Her breathing picked up and she finally met his eyes which were full of concern, "I hate myself, Jug."

His eyes followed hers around as they jumped from object to object around her room, as if searching for something. He caressed her cheek and lifted her chin, "What's going on in there?" He nodded to her head and she slowly inched away from him.

Her hand grabbed his wrist and pushed it away from her, "You don't wanna touch me." A tear dropped down her cheek.

He licked his lips, and looked her up and down. Her whole body was tense; fingers curling in, knees pressed together, shoulders raised. He grabbed her hands and pushed them flat against her thighs to stop her, but she flung his hands away and stood, rushing into her bathroom.

"Betty, you can talk to me." He followed her and put his hand against the locked door. "Just talk to me." Jug pressed his ear on the door, trying to hear her if she said anything.

Inside she was pacing in circles in the dark, thinking. Only the moonlight illuminating the room. Every possible outcome of this ran through her mind. None were good. She didn't want to be with Archie. She didn't see a future with him. She wants nothing to do with this town and he never wants to leave it. They were so different, so incongruous, so irreconcilable. The idea of actually being with him felt grotesque to her. Yet she kissed him. Why did she do that? Why was she so conflicted? There's no way Jughead could forgive that. She'd be alone. Jughead won't want her and she doesn't want Archie. She won't get to love the only man she's ever loved. Her heart stopped and she faced herself in the mirror. She just hurt the only man she's ever loved. Truly loved. How is that love? That can't be love.