A Different Perspective

Prologue: Inner Turmoil

TW: Angst, mention of suicidal thoughts

Narration

Thomas' mindscape was a mess.

After discovering he could summon his sides, Roman gave Thomas the brilliant idea to make videos solving his problems with his sides. And, yeah, the idea was cool. All the sides would shapeshift to look like Thomas (what, you thought they looked the same? No, their actual appearances reflected who they were as a side.) and stand in a corner each, debating and slowly piecing together problems.

Or so Thomas thought. In reality, behind the camera his sides were slowly getting at eachothers throats. At some point 'Light vs. Dark' became a thing, and with the added pressure of so many fans waiting on the next episode, certain sides were beginning to be overworked and snappy.

Roman was being worn down to the bone trying to make his creations as perfectly perfect as perfect could be. But, Virgil was always pacing around and applying pressure to go faster, stressing Roman out. Not to mention Logan, whose tight schedule and need to make sure no one was made a fool out of made getting a script done without totally rewriting it near impossible. Patton seemed to help. Whenever he could actually get around to Roman.

The jumbled mess that was Thomas apparently needed a LOT of emotional counseling and it was wearing even Patton's god-like patience thin. Roman? Angry and stressed. Logan? Frustrated no matter how much he denied it. Virgil? A ticking time bomb of a looming panic attack just waiting to happen. Plus, Patton refused to ignore his darker sons. Janus was beyond annoyed because no one would listen to him when he demanded Thomas get some me time. Thomas hadn't gone out with his friends in AGES and Janus, ever the quiet intellectual, was keeping track of the quickly declining mental health. Then there was Remus, who seemed so amped up on thoughts of failure and not being good enough that Patton had to hide all sharp objects in the mindscape several months ago. All these sides, and no one was helping Patton, who was undoubtedly the most emotional side. Hell, emotions were Patton's thing! And he was drowning in them behind a porcelain mask of white, smiling teeth and laughter.

Virgil himself, couldn't help his seeming loss of self-control. He didn't WANT to annoy Roman. Really, he didn't want to annoy any side. But the adrenaline levels in Thomas seemed to be putting Virgil on edge CONSTANTLY. Virgil was jumpy, tired, and downright distressed. In the old days, a mood like this would have had Virgil cuddling with Janus while they watched Disney together. But, that was no more. Roman's 'Light vs. Dark' statements had made it impossible for Virgil to talk to his old friends without Roman telling him he was betraying Thomas. All Virgil honestly wanted was a cuddle pile with his family and some much needed sleep.

Logan was... intense. (That was the closest to an emotion that Logan would admit or allow) They were behind Logan's beyond flawless schedule and Roman couldn't seem to work fast enough to keep up. Virgil was so jittery and kept bringing up worries, occasionally with Remus in tow, that Logan had to logic his way out of constantly. Janus was riding on Logan to enforce a bedtime AT LEAST and, while Logan agreed, they simply didn't have time to sleep anymore. And Patton? Logan didn't have to worry about Patton.

Remus was suicidal with so many overwhelming, intrusive thoughts of failure and never being good enough. Remus was frequently in hysterics and absorbed much of poor Patton's time and limited energy. But, Remus couldn't help it. The stress load was making the voice in Remus' head unbearable and headache inducingly loud. He missed his old thoughts of all the ways a spider could impregnate a unicorn or what the world would be like if spiders were the size of unicorns. He missed them... but THOSE intrusive thoughts were long gone.

Then, there was Janus. Deciet, the liar. The other sides didn't get it. Janus was also Self Preservation. The "selfish" thoughts and such that Thomas had. Selfish. Like, eating. Or sleeping. Janus was well aware that with all the sides on the precipice of a meltdown, not to mention the one suicidal side, that Thomas' life was in ACTUAL danger. But, poor Janus couldn't keep up. Especially since he had long ago been deemed solely a liar. Meaning all his advice made Thomas think he DIDN'T need sleep. That he DIDN'T need to eat.

And with all that inner turmoil, tensions were high. Sides were ready to snap. Thomas' mindscape was a mess.