Chapter 48

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Chapter 48: Blamed


"That's her, right? Siya 'yung pumatay sa tatay niya tapos sinabing pinagsamantahalahan daw siya ng asawa niya?"


To all the people I pass by, they all know who I am. Do they think I couldn't hear their gossip? I want to rip my ears off because all the words coming out from their mouth was unpleasant to hear. Just because my husband is a policeman, does that mean I can't be a victim?


Iba rin pala ang talas ng pandinig nila dahil kung anong marinig nila ay 'yon kaagad ang pinaniniwalaan nila. Nakakalungkot na kaya nilang pakinggan ang sinasabi ng iba pero hindi man lang kayang pakinggan ang taong nagdurusa.


Ngayon, ngayon ako haharap sa korte at si Morde ang tumatayong abogado ko. Even though I'm scared, I want to prove that my dark past doesn't give me the authority not to defend myself.


Just for once, I want to have my justice and I hope the court will give me that.


"Asawa naman niya 'yon pero bakit tumanggi pa siya?"


Kasalanan ko ba na ayokong makipag-talik sa asawa ko? Kasalanan ko ba kung bakit ako umiiyak sa mga gabing sinasaktan ako ni Desmond? Kasalanan ko ba kung bakit ako pinagsamantalahan? Lahat na lang ba kasalanan ko?


Nangilid ang mga luha ko dahil sa mga sinasabi nila pero dumiretso na ako papasok sa korte at tumambad sa akin ang maraming tao na gustong mapanood ang paglilitis. Nanginig ang katawan ko nang dumako sa akin ang mapang-husga nilang mga tingin.


Do I look like the aggressor? Do I look like the rapist in your eyes? Wake up! I'm the one who was raped by my abusive husband. Why do you look at me as if it was my mistake?


Nahiwa ang tiyan ng mga nagkukumpulang tao nang dumating ako. Panay ang kuha nila ng litrato sa akin at halos marindi na ako dahil sa mga tanong nila. Please, leave me alone!


"Ma'am Eliza, what can you say about Desmond's denial about the care?" the reporter asked me, but I just lowered my head and kept my mouth shut.


"Is it true that you cheated on your husband?"


"Hindi na talaga siya nahiya. She cheated on her husband, and now she's suing him. Unbelievable!"


These people didn't know what I've gone through. In their eyes, I was the bad one just because my husband is a policeman. They had the time to listen to Desmond's statement, but when it came to me, all of their ears became deaf. Why are these people one-sided?


Paano nasisikmura ng pulis na 'yon na maglingkod sa bayan kung isa siyang protektor ng sindikato? Sa tuwing binabanggit ang pangalan niya kasama ang ranggo niya ay hindi ba siya nakokonsensya na pinagkatiwalaan siya ng mga tao?


I swallowed hard as I got inside the court. The ambiance was odd, making my muscles tensed. After eight years, I'm here again, claiming for justice that I didn't do before. I was a victim again of abuse, and this time I will defend myself.

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