Finding Zuho

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Firetruck sirens blared in a distance, causing an unknowing Sera to emerge from her peaceful slumber. She has spent 25 years of her life occasionally wondering why, of all places in their fairly big community, her ancestors decided to build their house two blocks away from a fire station. And, like those mornings when she had the same experience, she heaved a deep sigh and whispered, "May everyone involved in the unfortunate fire incident be alive and safe."

With all her might, she forced her eyes open to welcome yet another day of self-loathing that she likes to think is a form of self-discovery. Just like how there are five stages of grief, she believes that discovering one's self is a lifetime journey that progresses through five different—not necessarily mutually exclusive—stages as well, namely (1) indifference, (2) self-loathing, (3) bargaining, (4) bettering, and (5) acceptance. Currently, she is like a pendulum that is constantly swinging back and forth between the second and third.

After making her bed, she proceeded with her morning rituals— one that involved, aside from the usual groaning, doing stretches that she, herself, admits to be bare minimum as it barely lasts a minute, and washing her face. Catching a glimpse of her toothbrush, she found herself wondering why some people brush their teeth before eating breakfast. And after they eat, what? Brush their teeth again? Wouldn't that damage the teeth more? she thought. "Maybe you should've become a dentist," she told her reflection on the bathroom mirror.

"Talking to yourself again?" her roommate, Lane, jokingly asked as she got out of the bathroom.

"Yeah, thought I needed a little pep talk to start the day," Sera said back.

Lane is the perfect roommate to Sera. She never brought a boyfriend home as per their roommate agreement and would always bring her food from her hometown whenever she goes back home for the holidays. Luckily for Sera, it's her own house so she does not need to bring her anything as she remains cooped up at home, alone, watching videos of her K-Pop idols like she had never seen them before, and some K-Drama episodes thrown in between. One interest they share is their love for Hallyu or the Korean wave. Though Lane has only been a fan of K-Pop for several years, in terms of general know-hows and depth of artist knowledge, she exceeds Sera, who has been a fan for a decade. In her defense, she likes a lot of groups, dividing her attention and the space in her memory.

"Hey. Earth to Sera!" Lane called. Apparently, she was having a one-sided conversation with a distracted Sera.

"Sorry. What is it?" she asked.

"I said I'll be home late tonight."

"I thought WINNER's concert is tomorrow?" Sera asked, confusion evident on her face.

"Yeah. Tonight is the fansign," Lane answered with a suggestive grin on her face.

"Oh, you won!? Congratulations!" she exclaimed as she poured herself a bowl of cereal.

"Thanks! But, yeah, I'm gonna be leeching off of you for about a month... but thank you!"

Sera looked at her with wide eyes. "What? How much is the fansign ticket?"

Lane made a weird face then took a seat opposite her on the dining table. "Oh, sweetie. That's not how it works."

"What do you mean?" Sera asked with a mouthful of mixed milk and still-crispy cereal. She likes her cereal not soggy but also not too crispy.

"It's via raffle. The more albums you buy, the more chances you have of winning," Lane explained.

She tilted her head to the side with a look on her face that said that's absurd! "So you have to be either lucky or rich, or both, in order to win?"