UA Traitor (?) - finished

Part 27

Deku PoV

I lie in my hospital bed. The doctor gave me something to calm me down. He also told me that we won't allow people to visit me as long as my condition is like this. Well who would want to visit me anyways? Well Kacchan and Todoroki-kun did. Did he really tell the truth?

I don't think so. They probably only said that because they feel guilty or rather because they're in trouble now for letting this happen.

"Oh yeah you're right. I didn't think about it, but they were in charge of me, so they're in trouble." I chuckle sadly. "Even when I die I'm just a bother to anyone. I can't do anything right." I cry. I cry untill I fell asleep again.

It's been a week now since I tried to kill myself. Today the doctors want to discharge me and Aizawa-Sensei came to pick me up. My mom was here too and she was really worried. She talked a lot with Aizawa-Sensei and they agreed to put me back in UA because my condition is still unstable. My mom can't be around 24/7, she still has to work, so they take me back to UA to look after me so that won't happen again.

I leave the hospital with Aizawa-Sensei and we go to his car. I didn't talk to him, well I barely did the last days only if necessary, but he accept it and it's a silent drive back to UA. After 10 minuites of driving we arrive and Aizawa-Sensei escorts me to the dorms. Once we enter the people, that were sitting in the common area, notice me and aproach me. They ask me some things like "How are you?" "What happened?" and some things like that. I don't answear any of them, I just look at the floor and let my head hang down. I don't want to talk to anyone.

"Hey Extras can't you see he doesn't want to answear your questions?! He just arrived!! Give him some space Idiots!!" Kacchan says at the bottom of the stairs. After he said that the crowd around me lifts and I'm just standing there in the entrance hallway.

I don't know how long I stand there but suddenly Kacchan takes my hand, carefully so he won't hurt me because of the cuts, and drags me up the stairs and to my room. It is a quiet walk, neither of us is talking. I just let Kacchan drag me through the dorm. When we arrive at my room Kacchan opens the door and leads me inside.

Someone must have cleaned my room. There is no blood to be seen and everything was put back in the cabinets. I made a mess while searching for somehing I could use. Everything is clean now. I sit down on my bed, still just watching the floor. I don't want to look at anyone.

"Hey Deku.....How are you?" Kacchan finally breaks the silence.

"I-I'm fine."

"Don't lie to me! You're obviously not." He sighs. "Listen I understand you don't want to talk about it, but you can't just keep everything inside you. You need to talk to someone. If you don't want to talk with me I can get Icyhot and you talk with him or a teacher if you want. But pleae share your feelings and thoughts with someone."

Yeah share your feelings and thoughts with your bullie. Very good idea.

"Why? Why do you try beeing nice to me Kacchan? I know you hate me. I accepted it a long time ago, so why do you act nice all of a sudden? Is it because you feel guilty? Because your afraid I could do it again!? I don't need your pity. Stop acting like this I don't believe you. I also don't believe your strange confession! Stop lying at me! I know you don't love me and Todoroki-kun neither! You can't love me!! I'm not worthy beeing loved." The last part I only get out as a whisper. I don't know if he even heard it, but I mean it. Who could ever love someone like me? I'm weak and pathetic on top of that I'm crazy and talk to a voice inside my head. These aren't characteristics someone could love. They would be better withou-...

Kacchan breaks my rambling of thoughts by taking me into an embrace. My eyes widen. Why? Why is he doing this?

"Stupid Nerd. Don't say something like that!! I don't hate you, I never did. Back then I wasn't sure about my feelings and I wanted them to go, so I tried to push you away. I'm sorry for everything. Don't say some bullsh*t like 'I'm not worthy beeing loved', because if you're not worthy beeing loved, no one is. You are allowed to be loved and you are. Your mom loves you, your friends love you and Todoroki and I fell for the same boy. We both are in love with you. Please don't push yourself down." His voice is shaky and breaks at some points. I-Is he crying?