Too Much

Jongup and Zelo, B.A.P

My poor Zelo, always putting forth as much energy and power he could as the maknae. The recent news of his pregnancy stopped this urge hardly at all. He still danced his all during practice and live performances, which worried me.

It worried me long before the pregnancy but now that he was carrying our child I was fully against this. But no matter how much I complained to him about how much effort he put in he still did it, and just brushed me off saying that I was overreacting and that he was still early in the pregnancy so he still had all the energy in the world.

Nonetheless everyday after practice he would fall asleep anywhere his head could lay down at. I knew that he was overly tired and was over working himself but I was sure he wouldn't go this far.

I had walked in on Zelo practicing LTE rapping and dance moves since one o'clock and it was five. Practicing a tad bit harder than he should in his state was one things but practicing harder than his fragile body could stand was another. He was pregnant and his body needed rest and relaxation.

I forced the door to the practice door open and stormed into the brightly lit room. "Choi Junhong, what the hell are you doing practicing right now!" I surprised him while he was practicing a step and he missed it and slipped but I caught him just before he fell.

Before he could protest I pulled him into the corner and sat down with him in my arms and rocked lightly.

"Baby why are you practicing so hard?" I pulled him closer to my body as he began to break down.

"I....I am so ashamed in myself!" He yelled and beat on my chest and pulled away and leaned back on the mirror with his hands pulling his hair.

"I am the maknae and I am already pregnant! I know how disappointed everyone is in me, I see the way the hyungs look at me, the way the other trainees give me that disgusted look, the way the manager 'accidentally' leaves me out of all the conversations and idea making. I just need to perfect everything, I just hate myself, how could I let this happen to myself, and you! You're only nineteen, and I've already ruined your youth years with this pregnancy....I've already messed to much up the least I can do is keep my dance moves and rapping acute!" He yelled as he bang his hands in the wall and floor, crying his eyes out and screaming his head off.

The picture of my one and only love right now made my stomach churn and the guilty feeling I felt right then was unexplainable, it was almost as if the tears that were falling down his face were making a turn and punching me in the gut.

I did this to him, I got him pregnant and I ruined his life.

I instantly wrapped my arms around and he screamed and cried into my shirt, making it wet, but I couldn't care less. All I wanted was to make Zelo understand that even if people were disappointed in him, forcing his tired body to work overtime was not the answer.

"Junnie....none of this is your fault, and you have not ruined my life. The least you've done is made my life even better with this baby, I love you more than anything else on Earth and you having a child only pulls me closer to that love everyday," I held him as his howling cries turned into high pitch hiccups

"I st-still....h-h-have t-to pp-prove that-t I am sti-still tale-talented and I-Im not some two dollar whore who got knocked up by his older boyfriend." He stuttered uncontrollably.

"Zelo, just because of people who don't understand the fact that, that baby was made of pure love then you don't need to care. You think I don't see the looks we get when we walk somewhere together, I do, but just simply don't care. Those people are naive idiots who don't know the feeling of love. You don't have to impress anyone, the only duty that you have to live up to is your duty to relax yourself and carry our child healthily!" He looked up from my now soaked short with puffy red eyes.

"I don't disgust you?" His bottom lip quivered powerfully and his slightly noticeable stomach bulge was neatly pressed against my thigh. "I can't even describe to you how much I love you, I wouldn't be able to breathe without you" I kissed his thick lips.

"Now, let's get you to bed I know you must be exhausted" I pulled him up and decided to carry him to the dorm. I wrapped his legs around my waist and he wrapped his arms around my neck.

I smiled at him before walking to a dorm of sleeping members. I looked at Zelo only to see his cream colored eye lids tightly shut. I laid him down on our bed before cuddling beside him and pulling the thick duvet over our bodies.