saudade

the right keys

  Outside of the castle's walls, one of the worst storms of the year raged on. With the Queen's side pressed against the window, Mal sighed and pushed off the frozen glass. Trees were stripped of their remaining leaves by the unforgiving winds and the ground was covered by the ashes of clouds. She hated the cold. It reminded her too much of home. The streets of the Isle were never warm; always had a cool wound that would sweep in through your hair leaving goosebumps on your pale skin.
As Mal moved from the window she was greeted by the black box-looking instrument that would make anyone envious of the royals. The grand piano was not only expensive but an old family relic. It was here from the time of Ben's grandparents' age and their fathers.
  Mal had heard him play its keys a million times before but yet it felt so foreign. Had there been this many fingerings to one hand? Even with her hands placed the way Ben had learned— perfectly still with knuckles up and light —her hands couldn't move at in the rhythm he did. She winced as a loud D flat sounded through the performance hall. Maybe she'd be better sticking to the higher octaves. As she began to grow familiar with the several keys, her brain had fogged once she felt a hand on her lower waist.
  "Need some help?" Asked the pianist himself. The usually fancy-looking king has instead dressed in a pair of jeans and a blue t-shirt. True king materiel. What can she say? She too wore jeans with a bell-sleeved top.
  "Was it that bad?" Mal asked Ben desperate for his approval. It had no business meaning so much to her yet she was on the edge of her seat waiting for his response. 
  "Decent." He breathed reaching forward and placing her hands correctly on the keys. "Here, allow me."
  With a hand beside her's, he showed her which key to press in a mirror reflection. She focused intensely on the notes in front of her careful to impress him. Even after years of being a couple, she wanted him to be equally impressed with her every day like she was with him. Nonetheless, she felt his soft smile as he directed her— no sense of annoyance or disgust. His soft eyes staring at her causing her cheeks to burn.
  "You're doing amazing." Ben encouraged as the sweet sound of harmony filled the once silent room. "I can give you some lessons even."
  As he guided her through the song she couldn't help but notice the polished silver ring that was carefully made for his ring finger. She glanced at her own seeing how it was an almost identical match with an added diamond.
"I remember the day you gave me this," Mal softly spoke suddenly stopping the right side's sound. Her hand instead admiring the band. "You were so relieved when I nodded my head, I swear you're heart starting to beat again."
But Ben continued to play a softer tune alone. "When you placed mine on my hand I was sweating so bad and trying my hardest not to cry. I know it would have been cute like Doug's but I didn't want to take any attention off of you," he laughed and faced her, still playing. "You were so beautiful in that dress. I wanted to marry you again just to see it."
A light blush clouded her face as she stared into that childish grin. "Thank Evie."
Suddenly the music evaporated into thin air. Instead, she felt her heart pound like a drum in her chest to replace the once soothing beat. His fingers had moved from the white keys to her chin, slowly tilting her chin, yet his eyes stayed the same. Filled with love that was backed by a burning admiration. His thumb delicately away from the drool on her lower lip with a handsome chuckle. Mal's white face turned red but she didn't have time to worry about that. His lips already met her's: hard and warm and delicate.
It's like swimming in a golden river. Too swept up in the current to realize she was drowning and how nothing mattered anymore. This was all that mattered. This. Not the storm outside that seemed to silent, nor the endless stack of papers on his desk. Just the kiss and the hand which traveled from her waist to the curve of her hip.
It was like breathing in the oxygen of the clouds as her lips hovered just below his. Still enough to smell the freshly minted breath. Still enough to close the gap.
"I love you, Ben." Mal breathed unable to catch the breath he had stolen.
Instead of returning the brilliant phrase, he grins absently. "I love it when you say my name." He explains. "I don't know why."
Her brows furrowed with his fingers still holding her face. "But your name isn't Ben." Mal pointed out. "Your name is Benjamin."
"God I love that."
"What? You're name?"
"Only when you say it." His grin widened and he leaned forward, placing a small kiss on the tip of her nose, and slowly slid his fingers from her chin.
"You're too much," Mal told him as she scooted off the seat. Her heart still raced in her chest.
  "And you are too little." Ben returned offering her his hand. "Come on, I have something to show you."
  She cocked her an eyebrow and hesitantly accepted his offer. "What exactly are you up to, Ben?"
  The young King shrugged and pulled her closer.
  Silently he began to lead her. Her eyes landed on many portraits of memories hung on the white walls of her home. As she looked to Ben, she saw the same kiddish smile she'd seen when they were much younger. The kind of smile a young boy had when he was experiencing true happiness. His eyes sparkled and his laughs, oh these damned laughs, was enough to break her serious walls. Mal soon found herself sharing the same expression and running even fast behind him.
  The couple stopped in front of a bare wall, Mal crouched with her hands on her knees. She glanced at Ben who stood tall with his hands on his hips and amazement in his eyes.
  "Do you plan to draw on the walls?" She asked, standing. Her posture wasn't perfect but neither was his.
  He shrugged and took a step forward. Puzzled, she watched as her grown husband talked into the wall and tapped it three times. "You're insane."
  "Am I?" Now leaning against the wall, it opened and he fell back.
  "Ben!" Ma lurched forward only to land roughly into him.
  Once her eyes adjusted to the dim light she realized her surroundings. Were they inside the castle? As she moved to sit up she realized she had landed on Ben. Her hands slowly traced down his body as she moved to sit up. Mal knew the gesture was extremely inappropriate but she didn't know how tall the ceiling was.
"Is now really the place for that?" Ben chuckled as he sat up beneath her.
  She pulled her hands back quickly to her chest. "You're the one who brought in here I don't-" her words were cut short by his hand. It tasted like sweat and honey.
  "Shh, listen."
  At first, all she heard was silence and then loud stomps above them. She fell into him and braced him and herself for impact only to find him laughing with his face covered trying to muffle himself. Keeping herself quiet she allowed a forced laugh to escape her lips.
  "I used to come here all the time," he whispered in her ear. "My parents hated it. And to be honest, I hated coming here alone, but the sound of the castle going around you and it being silent is just a different kind of relief."
  This was their first real moment of intimacy, Mal came to realize. Ben had never shown her anything like this while they dated, and she understood. This was his sanctuary. And he was her's.
Mal rested on him now in a loving manner than a scared-for-her life manner and just listened around them.
"Thank you for telling me about this place," Mal grabbed Ben's hand. "It means a lot." She added as he pulled her to him.
His hand now on the wall, he let go of her much to her dislike. "We're married now, we shouldn't have any secrets. Plus," the opening shut with a smooth slam. "We now have a place to meet where it's quiet and no one bombarding on our work."
  Mal reached for his hand. "Come on, Benny Boo, we have some piano lessons to get to."
  "I was kidding."
  "You were the one who challenged me."
  "How?!"
  "You trusted me so now I trust you to teach me."