Late Nights || Jean Kirstein x Reader

Late Nights. Part Two.

Since joining the Scouts nothing had gone right, it was a constant string of death and destruction. You'd known that though, you knew what the Scouts were. Commander Erwin didn't hold anything back when he told you all what you would be facing. Even before that you knew the pain of the Scouts. Your father had been one and he'd died. So you knew it could be hell. But your first actual mission being against the female titan, against Annie, that wasn't something you could have ever expected.

After the battle Annie had gone into some crystal and you lost her, the whole battle and loss of life was basically useless. There were positives in the situation, the Female Titan was under lock but it wasn't enough for the MP's. They were angry at Commander Erwin and to a point you understood, but no one but the Scouts seemed to understand the severity of what she was, what she'd done. How they were so detached from everything you couldn't understand. There were talks happening now but what those were you weren't privy to.

The best way you knew to take out your frustration was to train. Mikasa had agreed to help you with some hand-to-hand training and since Eren was meeting with Commander Erwin right now she didn't have anything else to do. Of course she was winning, you knew she would when you asked but it was good training. Mostly just dodging and working on endurance for you.

Putting your hands on your knees you caught your breath as Mikasa rubbed her shoulder, "Okay. I think I'm going to give." You were laughing but your lungs had a slight burn to them. There was always such a difference in training in the field and training like this. "Next time I'm asking Sasha, maybe she'll pull punches." You laughed.

A small smile was on Mikasa's face when you stood up, "You would have been angry if I'd have done that." She was right, "We've been at it for over an hour. I should see if Eren is back." She was right about the time, you hadn't realized it until you noticed the sun was setting.

She grabbed her shirt and pulled it back on, you'd both have to shower later but right now she was more interested in finding Eren and Armin. Sasha and Connie were heading out tomorrow so they were already sleeping, so you'd probably just head to the shower. Taking the towel she offered you, you wrapped it around your shoulders. It was your idea to train so you'd make sure everything was cleaned up, you couldn't imagine how angry Captain Levi would be if he found out you guys made a mess and left it.

When the door opened you both turned around and saw Jean was standing in the doorway. He looked at you for a second before his eyes quickly went to Mikasa. You felt a sting when he looked at her. For a long time you tried to deny the fact that you did like him, he'd liked Mikasa since the first day he saw her and that didn't really leave any room for your feelings. You respected that, if he didn't think of you like that it was fine. Jean was still one of your best friends and so was Mikasa. But that didn't mean it didn't hurt when it was so clearly in front of you that you weren't the one he wanted.

Forcing yourself to look away from him when Mikasa walked out you focused on trying to clean up what mess you guys had made. It wasn't much, but things were out of order and that would cause issues. Focusing on something for a few minutes would help you get over the moment of jealousy. You felt bad about it, Mikasa hadn't done anything, honestly you were surprised more people weren't tripping over themselves to be near her. Still there were a few times you just wished you could be in her shoes, like when Jean forgot what he was saying because she walked into a room.

Before you finished you let out a huff realizing he was just standing there. "Did you need something?" You hadn't meant to sound so harsh, you cursed yourself for not waiting until you were sure you had the jealous part of your brain shut off. Jean still had a pink tinge to his cheeks when you looked at him and for a moment he looked confused. "Jean?"

"Oh. Yeah, I just uh..." He cleared his throat rubbing the back of his neck, he was still blushing. "I just wanted to check on you. I know you got thrown by Ann- the Female Titan." So he couldn't call her by her name either. "I didn't think you were supposed to be exerting yourself this soon."

The nasty bruise you'd gotten on your back from the fight with her titan had not gone away, it still looked bad. But the sharp pain down your spine wasn't really bothering you anymore and you had to do something. You were a soldier, you couldn't let bruising stop you from training. She'd not killed you or paralyzed you so you were better than half the people that came in contact with her in a fight. You could handle being sore. You couldn't survive if you got too soft.

Before you could pick up the training mat you and Mikasa had been using Jean was there picking it up instead. "I'm fine, just sore still." He was opening his mouth to say something but you were faster. "Besides, Mikasa took it easy on me so there isn't any real chance I could have hurt myself anyway."

It did feel good that he was worried, even if it was because you were his friend, it still was nice to know that he did care so much. You could imagine if it had been Sasha or Connie he would have yelled at them, called them idiots but with you, he didn't. He'd been a little different towards you since you stood at his house together. He was still loud and sometimes obnoxious, but there were times when he let himself be quiet and just... exist around you. You still didn't know exactly how to comfort him but just being around someone seemed to help him usually.

"Yeah well." Jean put the mat up before looking back at you for a second. His eyes darted away again, looking for something."You shouldn't take the risk if you don't need to." When he finally found what he was looking for he crossed the room and picked it up, holding it out to you, still not looking.

Your shirt. That was why he wasn't looking at you, and why he'd been blushing when Mikasa left the room. He'd been checking her out even if she was just dressed for training. Taking it from him you muttered a thanks before turning around. Mostly trying to keep him from seeing the annoyance that was on your face again. The sooner you could get in the shower and ignore everything that had happened these few weeks and pretend these last few minutes didn't really happen.

Before you could button the shirt Jean grabbed the collar pulling it down. "Shit..." you froze for a second, did it really look that bad? You could only see parts of your back in the mirror. "I can't believe I didn't see it coming." He was good at blaming himself, "You should ice it again."

Looking over your shoulder you could see a blotch of deep purple on your shoulder, that part wasn't really healing yet. "It still looks bad?" He gave a small huff when your eyes met. Basically telling you that was a stupid question. "It looks worse than it is. I promise." Maybe that would make him feel a little better.

His fingers ghosted over your shoulder blade where it probably looked the worst. His fingers slowly trailed towards your spine, you knew he was just looking at your injury but you couldn't help but close your eyes at his touch. He couldn't see your face thankfully, you didn't want him to see the change in your expression as you reveled in his touch, even if it was just the faintest of touches. Before this you didn't realize how much you really craved touch, maybe it was just his touch?

Goose bumps rose over your skin when his fingers slid down your spine and you turned around again. Your eyes locked and for a moment you thought he was going to say something, he opened his mouth but closed it quickly and let his hand fall and stepped back. You felt your own face heat up when he stepped back and you realized you were basically standing in front of him half dressed.

"Just... be careful okay? What would you have done if you'd have been hurt worse? We need you." He looked away from you as you buttoned your shirt. "And make sure you sleep soon, you look exhausted."

A laugh bubbled up out of your chest and he turned sharply. "Yes sir" When you gave him a half attempted salute he rolled his eyes and started walking away from you. "It was funny Jean." The laughter had hurt your chest though and he wasn't wrong about you being tired. "You should sleep too, Connie will probably try to wake you up in the morning when he leaves. I know Sasha will wake me up."

You both knew you were right, they'd never leave without saying anything to both Jean and yourself. He waved and muttered a goodnight before you stepped into your dorm to grab a change of clothes for the shower. Jean already gone when you came back out.