Hushed

Chapter Twelve

"I feel so awful," I say, taking Jocie's hands. "You designed this gorgeous gown and I ruined it!"

"Don't worry about it!" Jocie exclaims for the 100th time. "We could make you a hundred more like it. Besides, I have about ten more designs I want to try."

"I'm sorry," I say again. This time, Jocie just smiles and sighs.

To be entirely honest, I just want her to leave. But I can't seem like anything has changed, even though my parents dropped a huge weight onto my shoulders then sent me on my way with a vow of secrecy. There are people out there trying to kill me. And they have the resources to do it. 

"I don't want to keep you up," I say, inhaling deeply through my nose to slow my racing heart. "You probably have loads of work to do."

"You're right," Jocie says, frowning. "The... disturbance, it... threw some people off their game. I'm heading down to help Maia in the kitchens."

"She's probably waiting up for you," I say, crossing my fingers. Then I pause. "How are you feeling?" I ask. I probably should have brought that up first, but I've been a little distracted. 

"I'm okay," Jocie says, sighing. "I feel so bad for those poor guards who were injured. But Maia said they've tightened security, so there's nothing to worry about."

I nod, knowing full well the security around the palace will be at least tripled until the whole brigade of traitors (as my parents put it) are caught. As Mitchell pointed out, I am the only heir to the throne. Aunt Tilly would be next in line, which wouldn't be best for the country.

"I'm gonna head down to the kitchens, I guess," Jocie says, standing up from my bed and smiling at me. "Get some sleep, your highness. You look all stressed out."

I try to relax my face as Jocie leaves, wondering if she could also tell how distracted my mind was while she was here. 

The thing is, I doubt I'll be getting any sleep at all. An unknown number of my people are out there, plotting against me, wanting my head. And there isn't a single person I can tell. 

I'm almost settled under my covers when I hear a knock at my door. Not again. Just another person I have to lie to.

I slip out of bed and shuffle over to the door, cracking it open. I'm expecting to see Jocie, or even my parents coming to check on me. 

But its Mitchell. Again. 

"What's with the nightly room calls?" I ask, frowning. 

"I wanted to return this," he says, holding out my dagger. I take it quickly, glancing down the hallway. 

"Did anyone see you?" I whisper. 

"I'm not an idiot, Princess," he says, smiling. 

"I thought you were in the medical wing," I say. 

"I snuck out," he says. "They were gonna clear me in the morning, anyways. They just want to make sure the wound doesn't reopen or whatever."

I nod slightly, the memories of yesterday flashing through my mind again. I lean against the wall for support.

"Hey, are you okay?" he asks. I suck in a breath. 

"I'm fine," I say, standing back up and starting to close the door. "Good nig-"

"Stop," he says, blocking the door with his arm. "You're pale as a ghost. What's wrong?"

I stare at him for a moment, and then I break. Every emotion I've been feeling, the grief, the betrayal, fear, relief... they all come pouring out in the form of tears.