stay with me

Chapter 18

Grey:

The next two weeks fly by and before I know it it's almost time to leave for Thanksgiving break. I don't want to go home but I know I have to. It's not that I don't want to see my family because I do it's just that I don't want to be in that town surrounded by memories of him. Hunter and I have been happy the past two weeks together but that doesn't mean I have forgotten Jason. I'll never forget him but I'm trying to do what he asked. I'm trying to move on and Hunter has been helping me do it. We are both terrified half the time but like we agreed we have been working through our fear together. I often wonder what it is that he is afraid of or what has made him so afraid but I don't want to force him to tell me. He'll tell me when he's ready.

Hunter is another reason I don't want to go home. I don't want to leave him here but I know I can't take him home with me either. When he told me he wasn't going home for Thanksgiving the idea of him spending it in his apartment by himself broke my heart. He then told me a couple days later that one of Daniel's cousins lives about an hour away and invited them over. I feel slightly better when he tells me this. At least I know he won't be alone.

It is now Monday and Sam and I are leaving to go home tomorrow afternoon so I'm packing. I have been seriously procrastinating and when I got home this afternoon I found an angry note from Sam telling me that I needed to get my butt in gear and start packing. I'm almost done packing my suitcase when I hear a knock on the door. I go to answer it and as I get closer I feel a smile creep onto my face because I know its Hunter. It's strange but it's almost as if I can sense him when he's near or when he enters a room.

"Hey" I say happily when I open the door.

"Hey you" he says back to me as I step aside so he can come in. Hunter and I aren't exactly together. I'm not entirely sure how to describe our relationship but I know that he's special to me and that I'm special to him. I can tell by the way he looks at me. I feel comfortable and safe when I'm with him and I like that he doesn't put pressure on me to do stuff with him. We hardly ever even kiss but when we do it's absolutely incredible, most of the time we just hold hands and from time to time he'll kiss me on the cheek or my forehead. I have a feeling he can tell that I'm not ready yet for anything more and it doesn't seem to bother him at all. He seems content just to be with me.

"Sorry for just stopping by, I just wanted to make sure I got to see you before you left tomorrow" he says to me and his words melt my heart. He is so sweet.

"You don't have to apologize" I say to him. "You know you are more than welcome anytime." He smiles at me and the look in his eyes suggests that my words mean a lot to him. "Come on" I say taking his hand and leading him to my room. "I'm almost done packing."

"Are you excited to go home?" he asks once we enter my room and I resume packing.

I pause for a moment not sure how to answer. This is just such a sore subject but I guess if I'm going to really give this thing a try with Hunter I needed to start talking to him about important things. Baby steps I remind myself.

"Yes and no" I tell him and I hate how my voice wavers. He gives me a questioningly look and I know I need to explain some more. "It's complicated" I say and I immediately want to smack myself. It's complicated? Really Grey? Is that the best you can do? "I'm excited to see my parents and my sister, because I really do miss them, but there are other parts of my town that I won't be happy to return to." That's better Grey I say mentally patting myself on the back.

"I can understand that" he says to me after a moment and the look on his face suggests that he really does understand and I think it's because of personal experience. Maybe that's why he isn't going home.