The story follows the adventures of a dinosaur hunting detective named Landon dickinyourdaughter, and, his side chick Lauren. The two embark on a shitty adventure that most mere mortals could not endure. So follows, Enter Landon.
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Dark. Eerie. Quiet. These were all words in which the nights mood might be described. No crowing of the crows, no barking of the dogs, no mumbling amongst the crowd. This would be quite obvious of course, for there was nothing there to make such sounds. It was, dark, eerie, and quiet. Despite this however, one anomaly reast amongst the bitter unhappiness of this place, being a young man sitting spot in the middle. On a bench he lay, quietly muttering soft words to himself.
"My names Tyrone, and I came here to fuck your wife, long dick style", he whispered.
"Tyrone", a sexy voice muttered.
Tyrone stopped speaking and glanced at his blunt.
"Landon"
A man dressed in all black emerged from the darkness. He wore a trenchcoat sided with a hat and a mask to cover his face. He too moved silently, as if he was himself apart of the bitter blackness that surrounded him. This however did not disallow Tyrone from becoming aware of his presence, which almost frightened him at the though. The slight click of his boots against one another was enough to announce that he was here for business. Landon walked to the other side of the bench, whilst Tyrone kept his attention at his feet, rather than facing Landon himself.
"I trust you're aware that you're a very wanted man Tyrone. Plenty of people would kill to see your head nailed to their walls. And I mean that quite literally"
Staying silent, Tyrone lifted his head
"My names Tyrone, and I came here to fuck somebodies wife, long dick style"
Landon chuckled.
"I see", he muttered. "Well Tyrone, I believe you have reached a dead end. So I am going to give you two choices: Either you give yourself up to me, and plead mercy at court, or we can have a little dance."
Tyrone tightened his durag.
"My names Tyrone, and I didn't come here for no dancing bullshit. I can here to fuck somebodies wife, long dick style"
Landon nodded his head in understanding. Slowly, he removed a trenchcoat he had been wearing, and set his large hat down. He then took five steps back, cracked his knuckles, and nodded his head once more
"Let's dance"
Instantly, Landon darted towards Tyrone. Tyrone, with almost no time to react, tried to dodge him, but Landon was too fast. One quick jab and Tyrone was on the floor, face down.
Landon walked over to the body, which lie motionless.
And there it returned. The quietness. The dark, eerie, quietness. Suddenly, Tyrones body began to move once more. Landon took a step back and examined him as he regained balance.
"My names Tyrone, and I came here to fuck somebodies wife, long dick style"
Suddenly, Tyrone began to change. His hands became claws, mouth became snout, ass became tail, teeth became fangs. And there he was. Tyrone's true form. The wifefuckerasaurus.
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His durag now removed to reveal his drippy ass waves, he then took his turn at his enemy. Slashing one hand in Landons direction, he exhaled all of the African American force he had into one blow. But Landon was quicker. He took one further step back, and dodged the attack entirely. He then reached into his pocket to retrieve an item. But what could it be? A sword? A gun? A-
"Trying and fuck this", Landon says, and shoots Tyrone in the head.
Okay so it was definitely a gun. But still
Landon walks over to the body slowly, and peers into Tyrones lifeless eyes. They were black, just like his skin. Landon removed thr mask he had been wearing, knowing that his identify was safe from being revealed. He however was quite handsome. Tall, muscular, black hair, blue eyes. He stopped for a second to acknowledge that he had just killed one of the worlds most dangerous criminals, but he was interrupted by a loud annoyance.
"Good job Landonnnnn", a small voice exclaimed.
A tiny Asian girl emerged from the mist to hug the hero, despite the fact that Landon displayed that he was not in the mood.
"Oh hey Lauren"
"Sooooooo I saw you fighttt"
"And"
"Annnd you did good. I'm proud. But I'm thirsty. Can we go get Starbucks and shop for some new keychains. I only have ten and that's not enough for my 80's aesthetic"
Landon sighs in dismay. He pats Lauren on the shoulder and beckons her in the direction of the white girl haven.
