still friends?

twenty-six

a/n: so i watched the doc. I'm going to be a mess for the next week. but after watching and actually seeing how Billie acts in a relationship high key fucked me up, both good and bad. hahaha, anyway I'm probably gonna go live later today to talk about the doc.

TW: Talk of drug-use and brief mentions of suicide.

Over the next couple of weeks, I spent a lot of time with Skylar and Dallas. Sky agreed to see a therapist about her problem with cocaine. Dallas and I took shifts being at the apartment, I know we were suffocating her a little, but that's what we had to do to make sure she was staying clean. My heart broke into a million pieces every time she had a craving. It was terrifying, she would either break down crying and threaten to kill herself or she'd get psychotically mad. I didn't know how to help her other than being with her. It's a lot of work to babysit a grown person who's having symptoms of withdrawal. Her mood would change in a blink of an eye, she was irritated, dizzy and always felt sick. Her comments were rude and cruel. As far as her having feelings for Billie, neither of us has brought it up again. She was basically always high off weed now but I'd rather that than a cocaine high.

Billie was extremely busy during this time, with meetings, shoots, and interviews. She wanted to get that done so she could have a short break before leaving for the tour.

Skylar is mostly past the withdrawal stage at this point, luckily she hadn't been using for too long. The doctor told us she was lucky she stopped now because the withdrawal would have been ten times worse if she had been using for a long period of time. She still isn't eating much but the doctor said her appetite will come back soon. She isn't as skinny but definitely isn't back to a healthy weight yet. Other than that, she's mostly back to her bubbly old self who just smokes a lot of weed.

I'm fucking exhausted. All I want to do is cuddle up with Billie, smoke some weed, and sleep for days on end. Which is exactly what I'm about to do. No one else is home but Billie and I, so Billie agreed that I could smoke. In fact, she almost encouraged it this time, she said I "deserved it after watching Sky."

We were currently laying down on the grass in her backyard as I slowly smoked a joint I had gotten from Sky.

"You do look kinda hot smoking that," Billie smirked as I exhaled the smooth smoke through my nose.

"I bet you would too," I smiled back, holding out the joint for her.

She looked at it for a brief second before shaking her head 'no', so I shrugged and took another hit.

"Oooooow I'm gonna try blowing O's," I cheesed, excited to maybe learn some tricks. I held the joint to my lips, inhaling, holding for a few seconds and exhaling, holding my mouth into an 'O' shape.

Billie burst out laughing at my failed attempt, making me laugh as well; which obviously led to me coughing.

"Wait wait, I can do it," I insisted, my words becoming slower the higher I got.
I took another hit and actually managed to blow out a few solid 'O's'.

"Wow, look how talented my baby is," Billie chucked, making fun of me.

After finishing the joint, Billie and I went back into her room where I immediately flopped down on the bed and stared at the ceiling, enjoying my high. Billie laid next to me on her side, propped up on her elbow and I could feel her stare which made my lips upturn into a smirk.

"Why are you staring at me?" I giggled, still staring at the ceiling.

"You're kinda cute when you're high," she muttered seductively.

Honestly, basically, anything Billie has done today has been turning me on. It's been a few weeks since we've been intimate, due to me spending so much time at Dallas and Sky's place.