Broken By A Savage: Her Pain, His Healing

Chapter 5

Robert- I'm done...

"Where is Amber?" I walked into the kitchen to see my wife Trina standing to the kitchen counter drinking her fifth glass of wine tonight. I had the urge to be close to her and wrap my arms around her waist. There was something deep in me that always desired to be close to her. No matter where me route took me it always led me back to her. As much as I wanted to be near her I knew better than to touch her right now.

"She went out with Andre."

"So, you decided to let our teenage daughter go out without telling me?"

"Robert don't start. I'm done arguing with you about this. She's eighteen and more than capable of looking after herself. I raised my child well enough for her to know right from wrong."

"Our child." she rolled her eyes and finished her glass of wine. Throwing the glass in the sink she walked passed me out of the kitchen. I followed behind her with every intention of stopping her from leaving. "Where you think you going like this Trina?"

"To mind my damn business Robert." she snatched away from me looking hurt. As if the sight of me was too painful to bear.

Over the years I'd done more than my part of running around. Our marriage wasn't perfect, but there was something here worth fighting for. Ever since I got a call from Nicki things have been downhill between Trina and me. She made the assumption that I was cheating. Nicki and I had more than just history between us and I thought that Trina would understand that. Before Amber was born I was in a relationship with Nicki. We meet while she was in nursing school, my dad sent me down south to live with my uncle hoping that he could make a man out of me and teach me some things about life. Unfortunately it backfired, the only thing my uncle was interested in was the money mad dad sent him to keep watch over me. I was running wild laying up with women that were old enough to be my mother. They took care of me as long as I took care of them. That was until I meet Nicki. I meet her and everything was different. She was the first woman I ever feel for and I had high hopes of making her my wife one day, but Nicki was different in every way. She was focused on school and bettering herself to get out of the south. She put her education before me and I was okay with that. I was immune to having women worship the ground that I walked on. Women that were willing to jump when I said so and then ask how high. I was a man and a man with needs, Nicki was so focused on school she put me to the waist side. So, me being young and stupid I feel for her friend. Someone desperate enough to do anything to have me on their arms. That woman just so happen to be Trina, Nicki's best friend. We started messing around and Trina ended up pregnant. I had to put my feelings aside and man up. I had to raise the child that I'd conceived, even if it was woman that I didn't love. Nicki switched schools and cut me off, I never got the chance to apologize or explain myself. Over the years I grew to have love for Trina but it was nothing compared to the love I had for Nicki.

"Look Ni-" I stopped myself before I could dig a deeper hole for myself. Looking in Trina's eyes all I could see where flames of hatred. "Look baby I just want to apologize for the other night. Your right I can be selfish at times, and I know I take you for granted. I plan on make it up to you-."I was cut off by her sudden interruption.

"You're what. How are you going to make it up to me? We go through this shit every time. I get mad at you for the same fucking reason you shut me up for a little while by giving me some lame ass one night only fuck me session. Only for you to do the same damn thing and go back to doing whatever you want to do. I'm married I shouldn't have to beg my husband to love to me! How hard is it for you to fuck your wife on a regular basis or better yet get my fucking name right! I shouldn't be just a quick nut to you!" she screamed at me at the top of her lungs, tears falling from her face. I wanted to say something, but there wasn't much for me to say without making things worse.

"I'm trying."

"How? How are you trying? Robert you had another child and didn't bother to tell me! How in the fuck do you think that makes me feel! And a baby with her of all people! I know I'm not perfect but I try my very best to make this thing work but I can't do this anymore! I'm sick of crying over the same shit!" I looked at her and for a minute I almost felt sorry. She was making it seem that the downfall of our family was all on me. Like she didn't play a part in is too.

"That's bullshit and you know it and excuse me if I don't feel the same way I once felt for you! Maybe it's the fact that after I found out that the woman I've given everything up for was fucking, sucking and slurping on someone I looked in the face every day! I gave up everything for you the love of my life-"

"Excuse the fuck out of me but I was supposed to be the love of your fucking life not that bitch Nicki. And no you didn't give up shit for me. You gave up her up for Amber the child we decided to lay down and make together! You don't think I have given up things for this marriage! And yes I fucked your business partner. You have some fucking nerve after you brought that bitch in my house tonight."

"The fuck are you talking about?"

"Lisa! The same bitch you've been sleeping with for the last six months! I saw the way she looked at you! Damn, I know I flunked out of school but baby I'm far from dumb. I saw all the messages and emails you sent her Robert! At least make the shit a little harder to find." she finally stopped yelling and wiped her tears away. "It doesn't matter anyway. I don't even know why I'm arguing with you right now."

"What the fuck are you talking about Trina? What do you mean none of this shit matters?"

"It means I'm leaving. I'm going to live my life and be happy. I'm not spending the rest of my life dragging behind you wishing you wake up and realize what you have. I'm done." By now she had her keys in her hand and her purse. She was headed for the door.

"What the fuck you mean you're leaving? What about our child what are you going to tell her!"

She didn't utter a word she just walked out.This shit seemed real familiar. Like tidal waves all the memories of me runningout on Trina played back in my mind. Only this time I was the one chasing afterher. This time I was the one left alone.