Learning to Fly

     It was a long queue of firsts staring me in the face, and I couldn't help but be thrilled and equally soaked in a cold sweat. There is a bored sort of comfort to be found in routine. From the safety of my mind it was easy to dream of an adventure, but reality was different. When presented with an opportunity the sticky fingers of pride and fear attempted to pluck the courage from my heart. 

     Life had coddled me so sweetly in a blanket of security that at times I was blinded to the gilded cage it could be. I often found myself clinging to the bars not in frustration, but much as a baby nuzzles its mother for familiar warmth. 

     Standing in Epply Airfield of Omaha, Nebraska cured me of that as I was on the cusp of boarding my first plane to Dallas, Texas. Alone. For all the marvels of human innovation, my 25 year old feet had never left the safety of the ground. I felt every bit the small town girl from Iowa as I faced my journey head on.

     A high-school friend from Louisiana had planned an epic road trip with a three day major rock festival in Ohio as the focal point. Our first two days would be spent exploring Dallas. I was the most excited about that because I had always dreamt of visiting a proper art museum, and Dallas was home to the wonderful Dallas Museum of Art. Next we would drive in a rental car bound for a small town in Louisiana where we had both spent our final years of high-school. There we would meet up with the friend of my friend, before setting off for Columbus, Ohio. A place none of us on the trip had been. It was an exhilarating notion.

     I liked to listen to most any music, but a rock festival wasn't exactly on my list of things I had to do. This trip was a gift extended to me by my friend free of charge except for the price of souvenirs and food. For me it was all about new experiences and broadening my horizon. With all that on my mind, I first had to go through airport security.

     The TSA agents were thorough in their inspection of me, but I respected the heart of their job which was the safety of everyone. I must admit though, it's a peculiar feeling when you know you've got nothing to hide, but you can't help but fear against all logic that you'll somehow encounter an issue. Due to my careful research on what can and cannot be taken past the gate, I was declared clean and checked my ticket anxious to find what gate I needed to be at. I was nervous to be doing it all alone, but trusted myself to the process. Luckily the airport was well marked and it was no arduous task.

     While waiting at the gate I was enchanted by a cluster of monks in yellow ochre robes, a sight I had never seen in real life. The world felt big, bright, and wonderful. After boarding the plane, a colorful behemoth of beauty belonging to Southwest, I was able to find a seat in between two polar opposite women. The one closest to the isle was a focused business woman who never looked up from her laptop even when the plane would eventually ascend the sky. The other was an elderly woman in the window seat, clearly scared about the upcoming flight. Her hands trembled as she cast worried glances out the bright airplane window.

     And then there was me. Totally exhilarated. Not a drop of fear for the flight in me now that I had secured my seat and stowed my carry on successfully. I regretted not being able to share the experience with a companion, but felt grateful that a privilege like this was even available to me. Later my mom would tell me she had been able to see my plane in the sky, due to the Southwest colors that were recognizable even from a distance.

     I watched the flight attendants explain safety measures with a detached curiosity, the upcoming ascent occupying my mind. My seatbelt was fastened, my purse was safely stored under the seat in front of me, and the captain had given his speech. It was time.
It was odd when the plane began to move forward. I had been so distracted by the act of flight, that I had completely failed to think about how the plane would build momentum. It felt very much like riding in a bus as the plane was carefully maneuvered around the tarmac before finding the start of the runway and quickly gaining speed.

     Flight. There are no words. Once the plane left the ground it was such a liberating sensation. I had never felt anything like it in my life. I had a hard time not crowing in delight as a monumental milestone had been crossed for me. A triumphant grin stretched my face and even though I was alone, it somehow felt all the more victorious. I had done it. I hadn't let fear rule me. I had accepted the overly generous gift from my friend and my horizon was as endless as the one I could glimpse from the window.

     In hindsight the trip was branded a disaster, but I would never regret having gone. My world expanded so much in those 2 weeks and I would always be grateful for her gift. I would always see it for the kindness it was. Life isn't perfect. Our plans don't always work the way we had envisioned them. We make mistakes. We regret and get hurt. But every experience is valuable and an opportunity to grow. The world had gotten a little bit bigger for me and I had gotten a lot braver. Don't let fear pin you down when you were born to fly.