Brown Eyed Angel

And so it begins

"now put that strand over there-"

i followed Vertina's instructions and made a complicated braid-ponytail hybrid. Braidytail? Ponybraid? nope. "perfect!" she squealed. "you look amazing!" i sighed. "Grady! Vertina's glitching again!" Grady opened the door holding a toolbox. 

he fiddled with the spectral mirror a little, and added some stuff. "there" he said finally. "step back into range." i stepped back into range, and Vertina's small face popped up in the corner. she looks otherwise fine, but she was frozen. Grady sighed and got back to work. 

it gave me a chance to study Vertina for the first time. she was actually quite pretty. she had long raven black hair with some purple highlights, pale sparkling blue eyes, and lush pink lips. her face was slightly heart shaped, and she had light skin with a little shimmer. i bet nobody actually stops and looks at the tiny face in the mirror. its a shame, because Vertina is very pretty. i wonder where she goes when i'm out of range. 

suddenly, i found myself looking at my face. my long blond hair in that fancy style that Vertina had given me, a ghost of a smile on my serious face. i hadn't smiled a real smile in a long time, only fake ones that were for other people's enjoyment. most of the things i do are for other people's enjoyment. my eyes had a content look on them, but behind that look was a look of sadness and wistfulness. but nobody see's past the act. Keefe would have, once upon a time. but now even he's blind. ever since that mission we went on where his mom kidnapped him, he's been different. i've been able to fool his senses. its like his ability is weaker. 

and Fitz.... well, he loves me the way everyone else does. not real love. just something people mistake for real love when their desperate. i've been desperate for a long time, but not for love. love was something i had given up on a long time ago, after i realized the was no light at the end of the tunnel. Dex's love was the same way. everyone's love for me was the same. even Keefe's love for me had changed.  everyone's love had changed. 

"hey kiddo" i jumped at Grady's voice. he was giving me a concerned look. "you good? you seem kind of.... well, i haven't seen that expression on your face since the neverseen were defeated."

 i gave one go my signature fake smiles. ''im okay dad. just thinking." he nodded. "well, your meeting your friends in Atlantis in two minutes." my smile faltered. "what?" he looked down at his feet, like he didn't want to look me in the eye. "me and Eda coordinated it" he mumbled. "just thought- well maybe you wanted to- maybe-" i put the mask of all the emotions i wish i was feeling back on. "its okay. i'll get ready." he nodded happily, and walked out of the room. 

as soon as he left,  i took of the mask. my emotions, my real emotions, flooded through. pain, anger, sorrow, lonelyness.  all the wrong things. i curled up into a little ball in my bed. darkness began to cloud my mind, obscuring everything. i welcomed it. let the darkness come, let it make me go down so deep that i never emerge, let it take me out of this awful reality-

Atlantis

My friends faces filled my mind, but it didn't comfort me like it would have years ago, when i still had my innocence, when people still truly cared, when i still had hope. all their faces were a reminder of was that i had to got to Atlantis, or they would ask questions.

i ran downstairs, my plum colored dress swishing around my feet. i don't want to be wearing this. but its part of the act. and actress has to wear her costume at all times on stage, and can only take it off backstage where no one can see her except her fellow actors, exept my play is a one woman show.

i step up to the leap master and let the light carry me away, tickling me with its gentle warmth, settling its warm glow into the depths of my soul. then the happiness is gone, only a memory as i stand at the edge of a cliff overlooking the slate gray choppy ocean that matched my mood. 

the sky was covered in clouds. the ice cold wind stung my skin, blowing away my tears and chilling my bones, chasing all that was left of the warmth form light leaping away. the sharp rock reached above my shoe and dug into my ankles, bringing pain that hurt, but wasn't worse than the pain in my heart. 

slowly, the wind undid my hair and soon my hair tie was lost to the air, a possession of the sky now. my  now free hair blew around wildly, going all directions as if it wanted to fly off my head and go far far away. i still can't believe the entrance to Atlantis was such a harsh place, yet i found peace in all the rough and tumble. suddenly, i heard my friends come behind me. "Sup Foster?" Keefe asked, smirking. i laughed. lucky it didn't sound as hollow as empty as i felt. "Well, i'm tired of standing here" Linh giggled. "Sorry Sophie." Fitz threw a bottle in the water, and the tunnel to Atlantis opened. we jumped, and as we fell, and let loose one last sigh, resigned to my fate.

So.... yeah. i know this is super depressing, but i just wanted to write something like this. please dont kill me, it will get better! Maybe. *evil cackle* but seriously, sorry. im doing a thing where i publish each chapter at i finish it, so if i dont update in a while, thats because im busy or working. also, dont forget that comments matter! how will i know if i should keep writing! *deep breath* okay then. SEE YOU IN VEGAS! (should i do and author note for every chapter? LMK