I hate it. I'm so tired. I'm just don't want this. I have 20 minutes to do it. Before they understand what's happening. My hands are shaking. I just don't know. I don't want to live. My face is drowned. Ask this inside. My face is damp. I hate it. I don't want it. I must keep my voice down. My breathing hitched. My brain torn. I don't want to live. I'm hiding now. My music up all the way. Slowly going deaf. My words were on mute for so long. My back against the wall. I can't. I must remain smiling. If I don't. Them who will. I don't want to live anymore. I can't take it. I hate you. But, I love you. You fuck.
You fuck
You fuck
You fuck
You.
Them.
Who is it.
Stop making my mom cry. She is HURT enough as it is.
You fuck
You fuck
You fuckers.
You are the one that had my heart. He was the one who was slowly destroying me.
I can't tell anymore lies.
Mom, I'm a fucking mess. My boyfriend hates me and I am still dealing with this. I don't want to live. My father's death is hurting me. I dont sleep at night. I want to die. Mother, I forgive you for when you left. I do.
But please forgive what I'm about to do. I hope hell is okay. I won't see you again. And I'm sorry. But I must leave.
Alex, Jeremy, Marina, Cat. I love you all. With all my heart.
I might not go through with this.
This might be my last update. And to all of you. I love you. Goodbye.
