My Love will Never Die..

Regression.

Day 1:

Lucifer woke up feeling numb. Everything that happened yesterday just left him empty, as if a black hole was punched right into his heart sucking every bit of his soul. He quite well remembered the feeling it happened the last time, about a thousand years ago, when he lay beside the sulphur lake in Hell, when his body was melted from the burn of Fall and when he couldn't do anything except to wheeze against the excruciating pain overtaking his body and soul, but mind - his mind was numb. The numbness of abandonment; what so wrong had he done that his family completely disowned him? How cruel was he that none of his siblings even came to help him while he was literally melting in the Hell fire? The numbness covered him like a blanket for a few centuries. And then, then he squeezed his heart too hard to bleed those feelings out, until nothing but stony anger remained. Hell needed the anger. Hell had no place for weakness. And with that the numbness left and the Devil rose.

But now?

He is crippled from all the walls down and the feelings were far too empty as if the hole was sucking them too.

Lucifer swayed on both sides as he headed towards the bathroom, the misplaced breakdown the last night leaving him completely exhausted. He cleaned himself, wore a three piece suit, styled his hair, put on a smiling facade - that he knew he could do very well. Maybe it was another one of the Devil's charms. Or maybe it was his own desire - just to be happy. But thanks to his fate and a certain dear old dad, that was the thing he could never be.

His happiness was too ephemeral. And so he taught himself to be happy, even if he was not. Not really.

He could be absolutely devastated and yet nobody would give a damn about him, if he just could keep up his ruse of his charming facade. Chloe was the only person who could probably take a hint of the turmoil going on inside him behind the happy mask, but now he had broken her too.

Maybe he was broken. Maybe he was the broken bane who destroyed everything he touched. Earlier there was a part in the back of his mind which used to retaliate to this particular notion. But now?

Now he didn't have the strength to debate that. Not everyone could be wrong? Maze, Daniel, Chloe - they all couldn't be wrong. Maybe he was evil.
Maybe by only existing he had done the biggest evil.

The numbness increased tenfold.

Without a standing thought, He wrote the resignation letter and headed to the precinct. For the last time.

He arrived there one hour early to Chloe's shift. It was too soon for her to relive the horror she faced again. And he wasn't ready. He wasn't ready to look at the hatred on her face. If anything of him was stil working, he was sure it would break too if he saw her again.

He just couldn't take it anymore.

Lucifer descended the stairs and paused to look at the precinct for the final time, he gaped at Chloe's empty desk like it was the only thing in the world that mattered.. It was.. Not the desk, but Chloe. The sudden sharp pain in his heart escaped as a whimper from his throat.
It hurt, it really hurt. He didn't know how to stop it. The heat behind his eyes were going up to the extent of itching and he rubbed the heel of his palms in his eyes. They came out wet.

Pathetic.

Lucifer panned his eyes to scan the others, the officers he adored so much - Cacuzza tasting the savory muffins, Joan doing her normal paperwork, McMillan jumping up and down with his duty - he was always like that! And with that, His eyes moved to the Lab. Lucifer saw the chirpy scientist examining something behind the blinds.Miss Lopez was always a hardworker. He won't admit, but he really would miss all of them. Even Dan. Most of all the Detective.