Chapter 12: Dads Cry Too

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Kellin POV~

I cannot lose Carissa, I just can't. "Mr. Botswick, are you paying attention." My attorney asked. "You can call me Mr. Quinn or Kellin." I muttered. "Fair enough, Mr. Quinn. I said you will more than likely win custody." My attorney said. I hired the best attorney in Oregon because I really need to win this case. "How?" I asked. "The court system cater to the child's needs. You meet them all. Madison is a foster parent who was charged with child abuse. Well, at least now she is being charged with it." My attorney explained. "They will probably ask Carissa where she wants to go. Obviously she will choose you. Madison has no job since you fired her before she started working. This case is ours." He smiled.

I was helping Katelynne with dinner when Vic called me. I was happy to hear from him about Carissa. "Hey Vic what's up?" I answered. "It's about Carissa..." He paused. "We are putting you on speaker so Carissa can hear you too." Vic stated. "Alright, go on." I was concerned. Vic didn't sound happy about what he was going to say. "Carissa do you want to tell him?" I heard Vic whisper. "No." Carissa whispered back. What is this about? "Guys?" I asked. "Carissa started self harming again." Vic said. My heart sank. I went over to the bar stool and sat down. "W-What?" I stuttered. "She started self harming the day she got on the plane." Vic said. "Every day since then." Vic added. "Why?" I asked. My hands were shaking, and Katelynne noticed. She came over and hugged me from behind. "Lots of reasons. I'm watching her though. I just figured out too." Vic sounded like he was tearing up. I think Carissa was crying in the background. "Can I talk to Carissa?" I said shakily. "Of course." I heard shuffling of the phone and then I heard Carissa's voice. "Dad?" She said. "Carissa, why?" I asked her. "I didn't want to live anymore. I'm so sorry Dad. I can't believe what I did either. I'm so sorry." She muttered over and over again. "Carissa, Sweetie, it's okay. Just listen to me please. Don't do it ever again. I can't stand losing you. I love you." I started to sob. "Dad don't cry. I love you too." Carissa said. "I have to go Sweetie. Please don't hurt yourself again. I don't like it when fans do it, I don't like it when you do it. You mean so much to me. The fact that my own daughter has gone through all this shit makes me feel like I failed you." I said to her. "Dad I won't do it again. Vic has promised to help me and I know I can go to you too. In fact, I could go to anyone in Pierce The Veil and Sleeping With Sirens." She said. "Bye Sweetie, I love you." I said. "I love you too Dad." She said as she hung up.

"I guess my badass ain't so badass anymore."
I said to myself trying to cheer up. "What is wrong with Carissa?" Katelynne asked. "She self harmed again." I said. "Oh baby I'm so sorry." She said. "I am too." I mumbled.

We finished cooking and eating dinner. I tried to play with Copeland, but looking at her makes me wonder if she will self harm too. God she looks just like Carissa. It makes me want to smile and cry at the same time. I look at Liam and Rowan. They love Carissa. Liam even had a little crush on her. I chuckled to myself at that thought. I never want to lose Carissa. I love her so much it hurts.

A/N: I'm editing the chapters so ya. I'm just fixing grammatical errors. Some things are about to go crazy in this next part. Would you rather me update with 2 chapters at a time or 1? Comment please!

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