Twisted Fates (A Romanogers One Shot)

Twisted Fates

A/N: So context...Natasha in this story is still alive. Steve saved her (I will explain later). She retired from SHIELD and being a field agent as she lived alone in her apartment with only a few people knowing about her existence. This is a few years after the BLIP (also no offense stupid name).

Inspired because I am so mad with the FATWS with John Walker who had to be Captain America. I also changed some time lines.

     No. Was the only thing running through Natasha's head. She watched the news, mortified as she sees this man claiming to be the new Captain America. She has watched the clip maybe five or ten times already. She stopped counting as her whole world froze around her. That's not Captain America, her Steve Rogers. The man on the screen has the name of John Walker holding Steve's shield. The same shield she was accustomed to using in training and in battles. She remembers every grove of the shield and remembers the way Steve would smile as he watch her train with it. He even gave her her own pair of magnets so that they shield can return back to her if needed to in a battle. However she side in relief as she watched him walked in like he was a god in a different yet similar uniform. At least they had some honor by preserving the uniform she thought to herself.

     Natasha continues to watch his mannerism as he tries to imitates Steve's move. None of which seemed nature, everything robotic. She felt pity as she understood the about of pressure he has filling Steve's shoes. However no one can ever match him he is a gift of God, practically the perfect image of man, America's Golden Boy . Yet her blood boiled as she saw him wink straight into the camera. She sighed and shut off the tv not knowing how long she was staring at the screen. Must have been a while since her ramen noodles were cold. She got off her couch, threw out her food and grabbed a bottle of beer.

      She moved to her balcony grabbing her blanket from the couch as she made her way on to one of the balcony's chairs. She tried not to cry. Her life can not get any worse and wished Steve never came back for her. The air was cool as it was approaching night time in Brooklyn New York. She was never fond of New York or any place really since she learned to new get attached to places. However when the Avengers became a family, she began viewing New York as her home; her safe haven. As to Brooklyn, it was the only connection she had to Steve.

     She curled up into a ball as she looked up into the night sky. She thought it was raining but she only saw clear skies. Damn it, Steve! Natasha thought to herself. She promised that she wouldn't cry but she knew that was going to be a lie. She closed her eyes remembering Steve. Memories flooding in of all the happy moments with the constant flirting, certain shy smiles and laughs that were only reserved for her. She couldn't help laugh sarcastically and then remember the recent memories she had with him.

        Natasha was guaranteeing that is was pouring outside but the only water that was falling was her tears. All she wanted to do was scream and yell her heart out how can he do this to me! Why did I have to be so stupid! The only thing Natasha could feel was anger. Anger towards the government, anger towards Steve and most importantly anger towards herself. She should have told him sooner. I should have told Steve I loved him. Why couldn't I say it. Everyone knew I did, except for him. I should have been like Tony and made a life for myself with Steve. But no I had to push him away. I'm the one that shouldn't be here. Steve is supposed to be here not ME! At that moment she threw her bottle across the room listening to the glass break. She let a small whisper and name she hasn't said out loud for almost a year "Steve. I miss you so much. I love you. I love you so much that it hurts!" She curled herself into a ball holding her knees close to her chest and her head was in between the small space.

        She most have fallen asleep. Nightmares plagued herself, well more like memories. She sigh and walked back into her apartment staring at a wall. She can hear Steve's voice playing in that back of her head. Do you wanna keep staring at the wall, or do you wanna go to work? I mean, it's a pretty interesting wall. She turned to the side and saw that it was two am in the morning. She walked to her bedroom and laid down but knew she wouldn't get anymore sleep. She groaned knowing nothing is opened at this hour and has to wait to five in the morning for the gym to be opened. She kept replaying her memories that taunt her for being too slow and for her ego getting in between what could have been.