Recommended song:
•Because Of You - E'Last
-×-
Fully aware of the distant gazes and short judging glares aimed straight at his hoodied figure, Seoho further shrank into his hollow seat. His chewed up pencil had fallen to the cold concrete ground but he dared not to pick it up.
Seoho had always been curious and keeping in touch with himself, he knew that the moment he lifted himself from his seat and bent, his darting eyes would snipe the gruelling eyes upon him. Worse, he would see them come into view his own and within a heartbeat, they would avoid him.
Again.
Again, he had been reduced to the image of the unstable college student that he had broken free from about a year ago.
He did not need the pencil anyway.
His notepad had been blank from the beginning of the lecture.
-~-
Everything was a blur. The streets, the people passing by, the red and green lights, the honking and whatever.
Even the air was a blur.
He could not feel any oxygen going in. His eyes twitched from a hidden pain and his chest hurt from lack of nutrition.
Drifting his car to the side of the road and abruptly stopping the engine earned him a racket of screeching of tyres, blaring of vehicles, gasps and curses of people and they were all a blur.
His forehead dropped to the sweat laden leather covering of the steering wheel, his balled fist burning through on each side.
White clouds shaded the lens of his glasses with his deranged breaths.
Hiccups cut his breaths even more than ever and he just wanted to breathe.
Weeks worth of tears choked him at that cruel moment and he did not want to cry. All these days without Geonhak as his pillar, Seoho felt as if he was too weak to even cry.
However, presently, he wanted to- needed to- feeling as if he explode from the pent up tears, screams, sorrow, emotions-
And so, he yelled.
He yelled his heart out.
Some were short shrieks that pierced his own ear fuelled with anger. At Geonhak, the universe, himself for being so foolish as to play into his fickle desires for once. Just once.
Some were terrifying bawls that resonated within the closed-up vehicle and he wanted to escape but for some reason, he found comfort in it.
He was tired, so tired.
His sleep was non-existent because his chest hurt from the cold. He wanted the warmth beside him so badly and he would give up anything to have him back.
The white cardboard box rested on his lap, not quite having the guts to hurl the whole thing.
How could he? He had poured his whole heart- no, his existence- into the preparation of his contents.
ČTEŠ
Falling For You (From Dusk Till Dawn)| k.gh×l.sh
Fanfikce"Seoho was never his responsibility. Geonhak had never been assigned to him. They were never meant to cross paths. Life took its turns." wherein Seoho and Geonhak take their drastic falls for each other tw// many mentions of suicide, depressive diso...
