Please Don't Eat Me (Hannibal Lecter x Reader)

Chapter 31

My heels tapped on the marble floor, so shiny and clean it could be used as a mirror.

I walked to the front desk "Hi, I'm here to see Dr. Bloom." I said to the man behind the desk.

"Hi (y/n)." I heard Alana say. I turned around and smiled. She embraced me in a hug.

"It's so good to see you" She pulled away and continued "But I can't help wishing you were't here."

Silence lingered between us.

Alana started her upbeat tone again. "How's Mischa?"

I pushed a smile "Mischa is doing good. She misses you."

"Aw." Alana smiled. "Come, follow me." She waved me on while we continued our conversation.

"Wow I still can't believe you're in charge of all this." I said as she led me down a hallway. "Remind me why you wanted to work here?" I dryly chuckled when we passed some prison cells.

"There's only five doors between Hannibal and the outside." She stared forward. "And I have the keys to all of them." We continued to walk down the quite hallway.

"Does he know I'm visiting?"

"Yes"

I bit my lip.

Time slowly dripped on, it felt like corridors after corridors. Eventually we stopped in front of a large wooden door.

"You know you don't have to do this." She rested her hand on my upper arm.

"I know."

She frowned. "He'll be behind a thick glass wall the whole time. He won't have physical access to you. You'll be safe. This door will be unlocked" She motioned towards the door behind her. "You can leave whenever you feel uncomfortable. I will be near by so If you need anything just shout." She looked at me one more time before she opened the door.

I slowly walked through the threshold and heard the door close behind me.

There Hannibal was standing on the other side of the glass with a casual smile.

"Hello (y/n)." Hannibal held his hands behind his back while he stood tall.

"Hello Hannibal." I tried to say calmly but my voice shook. I stood away from the glass. Although their was a barrier between us I still feared what he was capable of.

"I'm glad you came, my other meetings are all professional." He stepped closer to the glass.

I bit my cheek and avoided his gaze.

"I see you still have the same habit." He paused. "Tell me (y/n), has your anxiety worsened?"

"I'm only here to say goodbye for good." I stared at my hands while I picked my nails.

"That's not true."

I didn't know what to say. I looked everywhere but at him. We barely started talking and I already felt Hannibal looking through the back of my skull, I felt like a fly flitting around.

His cell didn't look like a cell. He had two large bookcases with hundreds of books. The floors were wooden which complimented the white trim on the walls. There was a small bed in a corner and a desk in the middle of the room.

"You still wear the wedding ring I gave you." Hannibal nodded to my hand. He could see the tan line it left. I quickly hid my arm behind my back.

"How is Mischa?"

"Mischa is well. She'll be three in December."

Hannibal smiled. "Do you have a picture?"

I reached into my purse to find the picture I brought.

"May I hold it?" He asked. When he saw my hesitation he motioned to the slot further along the glass wall. I slowly walked towards it, Hannibal followed. I slid the picture through the opening. Once Hannibal received it I returned to a comfortable distance away from the glass wall.

I watched Hannibal stare at the photo and smile. A genuine smile. One I haven't seen in years and missed so much.

It was a photo of Mischa and I on her second birthday. Hannibal glided his fingers over the picture.

"May I keep this?"

I nodded.

We stood in silence while Hannibal continued to stare at the photo. I felt a question itching at my throat. The question whose answer I came here for. "Why?"

He looked up.

"Why wasn't I enough for you to change?" I finally was able to met his eyes.

"Nothing was enough to change me." He walked back to his desk and placed the photo down. "I was sentenced to live this life since I was a six year old boy."

"All these years and you still show no remorse for what you've done." I was able to look him in the eyes. "You continue to blame your sins on the past. Your trauma may explain your actions but not excuse them." The new found courage came from the three years of pent up anger. I hated him for what he's done to my daughter. I hated how he left her without a father. But selfishly I hate him the most for what he did to me.

"Where does the difference between the past and future come from?" Hannibal questioned.

"Mine?" I stared him right in the eyes. "Before you and after you."

I hated the man standing before me. "Yours? That's starting to blur." He wasn't the Hannibal I fell involve with. Was the Hannibal I knew real or just another mask he wore? "Do you even acknowledge the pain and suffering you caused?"

"Arguably, I ended the pain and suffering of the ones I killed."

I scoffed. This isn't the man that smiled at a photo of his wife and daughter. Was I finally behind the curtain? Is this the real Hannibal?

"Killing feels good to you." I spat at him.

"Killing must feel good to God too, he does it all the time." I could feel his piercing stare "Are we not created in his image?"

This was all a game to him. Playing with his food before he eats it whole.

"I don't recognize you anymore." I slowly looked up. I wanted to believe that Hannibal was the right person but wrong timing. Maybe if I got to him before his trauma than things may have turned out differently.

Being in this room for long enough made me realize what was behind the curtain all along, I was just too close to see it. "You alienated me from all my friends, you trapped me in the belly of the beast." A tear fell down my cheek. I wanted so badly to have Hannibal hold me in his arms and hush my crying. "You don't want anything in my life that isn't you."

"I want what's best for you."

I laughed "You thought feeding me corpses and leaving me to die in the cold tomb that was your house best for me?" I balled my fists. "Did you even love me?"

"I loved you the best way I knew how."

I stepped away from the glass "I was right. I am only here to say goodbye." Will Hannibal always have his claws ensnared in me?

I grabbed the ring in my purse and threw it in the slot. I turned around to leave. The echoing of the ring hitting the floor could be heard.

"When life becomes maddeningly polite, think about me" As I passed the threshold with tears falling down my face I heard, "Think about me (y/n)."

When I closed the door I had the absurd feeling Hannibal walked out with me.

~~~

Thank you so much for reading this book. I was playing around with the idea of a sequel. What do you think? No grantees though!