Home is Where the Heart Lies || Harmione

Chapter 1.2

It happens naturally. Hermione just starts sleeping in his room one day and neither of them comment on it.

This way, Harry won't have to run to Hermione's room when he's woken up by her screams at night; sometimes it's that night at Malfoy Manor that haunts her, sometimes it's the fear that her parents never regain her memory, but more often than not it concerns him.

"You died. You died." She muttered over and over as Harry held on to her. "You left me. You never even told me, just went to go die by yourself! How could you be so stupid? Do you know how I felt seeing your body, limp in Hagrid's arms?"

"I'm sorry," he tried to console her, rubbing her back even as her fists hit his side and he felt her tears at his collarbone. "Yes, I died. But I came back. I came back to you, Hermione."

Harry doesn't scream during his nightmares, but Hermione always seems to know he's had them just by looking at his face in the morning and never fails to fret over him. He doesn't like exposing his fears and he feels a bit silly because everyone's been telling him to move on and yet these dreams are proof that he hasn't.

But Hermione is nothing if not stubborn and insistent, so he tells her.

Sometimes, he sees Dobby's eyes glaze over and the red spread throughout that dirty pillowcase he always wore, sometimes he sees Sirius freezing in the middle of his laughter and falling through the veil, sometimes he hears her screams at Malfoy Manor and he's powerless to stop it.

The night after he confesses the last one, he finds her sleeping in his bed. They wake up in the morning holding on to each other and silently decide to keep it this way. It's just easier sleeping together. Practical. He feels safe in her arms and she does in his.

The only real downside is how conscious he starts becoming of her physical presence and his own craving for her touch. He finds that he likes the way her body fits into his arms as he spoons her from behind. He likes it when their legs get tangled when they sleep. He doesn't even mind that she moves in her sleep so much that some mornings he'll wake up to her weight on top of him, her head of bushy brown curls resting against his chest, and her soft breathing the only sound in the peaceful room.

On those mornings, he is content to stay in bed and play with her hair until she groggily wakes up, greeting her with a sheepish smile.

_____

The nightmares grow less frequent, but they are still there.

Harry confesses to her one night: "I have dreams about it too—dying."

Hermione stills.

"Especially right after the war, I used to dream that I was back at King's Cross Station and I would choose to go on, choose not to keep living. The other side had my parents and Sirius and I was so tempted. So bloody tempted to stay in the dream and never wake up." He reaches under the covers to grab her hand. "But I'm glad I didn't. Every day I spend with you, I'm a little more glad I chose to come back."

"If I hadn't, I wouldn't have—" he holds up their entwined hands, "—this."

Hermione makes a strange sound—a cross between a laugh and a sob—and breaks away from him.

Harry stares at his now bereft hand and back to her in confusion until she speaks.

"Harry—you can't—you can't just say things like that and expect me to not react!" She struggles for words and his mind freezes, wondering if he said something wrong.

"Oh, bugger this!" She makes a frustrated noise and throws her hands up in the air. "I can't do this anymore!"

"What—" Is all Harry has the chance to say before she's pushing him down on the bed, climbing on top of him, and kissing him senseless.

They don't get much sleep that night, but for once, it's not because of the nightmares.