"Don't start something you won't be able to finish," I threatened.
"You're no fun," she pouted, "I want this and you're ruining my moment."
***
Zayn, infuriated by his past, meets the alluring Sierra.
Sierra, tainted by the memory of her ex lover, m...
Standing right in front of me was Zayn's fucking girlfriend.
I didn't bother with a greeting, she didn't seem happy to be stuck in the same room as me and to be frank, neither was I. The feeling was mutual.
"So what's your name?"
"Sierra," she said dryly, not offering much.
"How the fuck did you get Zayn to date again then?" I laughed, still mind blown that Zayn was seeing someone.
Oops, hit a nerve there apparently.
"It's simple," she said sarcastically, "I don't go around cheating on my boyfriend."
I rolled my eyes at her statement, enjoying the icy tone she was giving me. Her opinions on Zayn were about to completely transform in a few seconds so I might as well show her some sympathy.
"You really don't know much, do you?" I asked her, watching her facial expression change from anger to hidden confusion.
"I know enough," she responded coldly, making me smile.
"I don't think you do," I smiled, relishing in her naivety, "you see, have you ever wondered why I cheated on him?"
"I don't want to know why you turned your back on him. I've come to realise you were just incapable of loving him."
How fucking dare she.
"Fuck you," I spat, "Zayn wasn't perfect, he was the furthest thing from it."
"He still isn't either. Yet, I don't use that against him."
"It would've never resolved to that if he hadn't hurt me," I retorted, "You've never met the person he used to be."
I knew I shouldn't hate Sierra, she was clueless after all. But she represented everything I never had with Zayn. And that made me envious.
She's happy with him.
Sierra sighed, irritated by my presence. "He loved you, you know?"
"Don't you ever say what he had for me was love," I hissed, lifting up my sleeve to expose my skin.
I ran a hand over the healed mark down my arm, the scars faded but still present.
A daily reminder of him.
"Do you wanna know how this happened?" I said, trying to keep my voice controlled and devoid of emotion.
"I don't see how a scar is relevant to our conversation," she snapped, keeping her eyes trained on my arm.
"Zayn and I were having another fight as usual. It'd been like that for a while, screaming at each other ruthlessly. Except this time I was scared because he'd developed a habit of throwing things when he was angry. I often used his past against him too, I'll admit that. I know I'm to blame for the way he is now when he's closed off to others."
I don't know if Sierra knew where this was going but if she did, she stayed quiet.
"I wanted to believe he would never harm me. But it was getting harder to believe that. Our constant fights were tiring us out and things weren't working. So one day, while I was doing the dishes, I brought up the topic of breaking up. We were both drunk and when he started swearing at me, I tried moving away because he looked like he was gonna throw something. He tried grabbing the plate I had and the anger in his eyes terrified me. So I pulled away to stop him. Next thing I know, the plates shattered on the floor and my arm is bleeding."
Sierra gasped but I didn't stop speaking.
"He tried to move me from the shards once he realised what he'd done but it was too late."
I clasped my shaking hands together, trying to control my breathing.
"I stayed with him one more month after that, I don't know why. I couldn't bear the look in his eyes when he brought me to the hospital. I lied to the nurses about what happened because Zayn looked so beside himself. He was so ashamed and when he wasn't trying to make up for what happened, he wallowed in self hatred. And yes, I cheated on him during that time. I know it was fucked but we weren't meant for each other."
Sierra looked absolutely mortified, rendered silent by shock. Zayn never fucking told her this, just like I'd presumed.
"I don't want your pity Sierra, I just wanted to tell you the truth. I'll admit, it does hurt to see him treat you right, in a way he could've never done with me. I saw you two dancing, you both looked so in love," I confessed, tears brimming in my eyes, "But that's how our relationship had started as well and next thing I know, he's throwing around shit because he can't control his fucking emotions. I hope you never witness that because the fear that he might let it out on you one day will paralyse you."
There were no tears in Sierra's eyes but I could tell that sadness had weighed in on her. Her eyes looked as if she'd been hurt before, in a different way and my story had messed her up.
The truth broke her.
"I don't know what to say to you Selene," she finally whispered, her voice wavering, "I hope you're happy now."
Sierra rushed out the bathroom before I could say anything else and I stood, rooted to the spot, overwhelmed with the decisions I'd just made.
I couldn't tell if I'd done the right thing. It was justified to do, especially if Zayn had been lying to her.
But I don't know if it was worth it when I saw the happiness fade from her so quickly.
As if someone had drained all the progress she's ever made in her life and poured it down a drain.
*** A/N: This chapter's short but there's clearly a lot to unpack here ✋🏻
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