25. A New Beginning

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I have a hard time falling asleep. Helping Carol with 'story time' will keep me occupied, but the kids are probably as annoying as the parents. Why did the farm have to fall? Why did the world have to fall? No! I have to stop thinking like that. Believe it or not my life is better out like this. I got Daryl and the rest of the group but most importantly I don't have my dad or Uncle or whatever he was.

My life is what I make of it now. I need to decide right now what I want to be to all these people. Am I tough and mean, or maybe I should be quiet and scared. On the other hand I could be nice and respectful (note sarcasm) not even I could pull that off. Daryl might think I've lost it. No I think now I'll just be myself. I'll keep my walls up, but I'm not going to walk around like I'm the apocalypse poster child.
I want people not to see me as dangerous but to see me as capable. I have some pretty good examples. Rick the leader, Glenn with how smart he is, Maggie is a fighter, Herschel is probably the wisest guy I've ever met, Carol is well scary but in a good way, and Daryl is... Daryl. I'm gonna be all of those, and I'm gonna keep my promise to Lori at the same time. I like Michonne, but I don't know if she'll stick around. I just hope nobody does anything stupid, we could all use a break.

My dog start Growling in his sleep and I can't help but wonder what dreams he has. They must be as messed up as mine are. Unfortunately, most of them are Pre-apocalypse. I sigh and cuddle up to Apollo and drift into a sleep plagued with nightmares of what the future might bring.

I wake up to a bunch of noise outside my cell. I decided there's no going back to sleep and even if there was I'm sick of the nightmares. I go out to find Carol sitting at a table. I sit across from her, still a little weary from the night before.

"Good morning, sweet-"

"Please, just don't. I have a feeling I'm gonna get talked down to by enough from the new people." Carol lets out a chuckle.

"Where Daryl?"

"He went on a run."

"He had all the people Time he could handle for one day?" I laugh and so does Carol as she nods her head.

"People kept calling him sir, or Mr. Dixon." I cringe just thinking about actually referring to him as that.

"Mase!" I hear Carl yell and I turn around to see him carrying Judith towards us.

"Hey Carl." I go turn back to see a bowl of oatmeal in front of me.
"What?"

"They brought it from Woodbury," Carol says flatly.

"I don't even remember what this tastes like!" Carl sits down and I take Jude from him. It's hard to keep her from snatching my bowl, but I manage. If I drop it I'd feel horrible for wasting such a precious delicacy.

"Want to help me clear some wall walkers?"

"Yeah, totally!" I just know it will get me away from these people. I decided to leave Apollo in the cell with the door open he's been tired lately and I'm afraid he's getting a bit lazy. He deserves a little break though... we all do.

     Carl gets up and takes Jude to give her to Beth.
"We have our first Story time today," Carol says nonchalantly.

"Sounds good, just send someone to get me from the wall whenever you're ready." She nods and gives me a half smile.

I think I'm starting to like the new Carol she's much better than the old one.

    "27!" I yell and Carl groans.

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