Word count-2639
You slowly walked down the street, everything around you a blur. You finally got to your car and opened the door. As you sat down and reached for your keys a cold hand grabbed your shoulder. You jumped from the contact and just as you were about to scream a hand wrapped around your mouth. Your eyes widened in fear and suddenly you felt a sharp pain in your side. You looked down to see someone once again stabbing you with a knife.
You jolted awake and you were already breathing heavily. You sat up your hands pulling at your hair causing you to pull some out. Your scalp hurt from how hard you were gripping your hair and suddenly you became sick to your stomach again. You jumped up and ran to the bathroom, just before you threw up Emily's hand wrapped around your hair pulling it back and her other hand rubbed your back. Once you were done throwing up you slid down onto the floor burying your head in your hands. Emily grabbed your wrists pulling them apart so that she could see your face, and so that you were looking at her.
"Baby you need to communicate with me. I know it's hard but I want to help you, and I can't help you if you don't help me understand", you shut your eyes tight and shook your head holding back a sob. "Y/N look at me", she said grabbing your jaw. This time it wasn't in an aggressive way instead in a comforting way. She held your face in her hand and her brow furrowed concerned about you. Just as you were about to open your mouth Hotch walked in carrying a glass of water.
"Is everything ok?", he asked, handing you the water. You wiped away your tears and stood up your entire demeanor changing. You were not letting another person witness you in your weakest state.
"I'm fine thank you", you said and walked out of the room. You weren't giving attitude in a sexual way, you just weren't ready to open up to Hotch. It took five years of being with Emily for her to learn just the gist of your childhood and mental health. You just wanted to be alone with Emily. That wasn't gonna happen tonight so you went to the kitchen sink and splashed water in your face. Emily and Hotch were in the bathroom so you couldn't lock yourself in a room to have privacy. These nightmares suck ass. Hotch stayed in the bathroom but eventually Emily followed you into the kitchen.
"Babe are you alright?"she asked.
"I'm fine Emily", you said coldly drying off your face. Her face dropped and you realized what you did, "I'm sorry i'm just... I don't know how to explain... I'm tired, it's just, these nightmares are hard to deal with. I'm sorry i didn't mean to snap at you", leave it to you to mess up things with your girlfriend because of your sucky mental health.
"It's alright", she claimed but you could hear the hurt in her voice, "I know that it's been a rough few days. Why don't we take a few days off of work and see if that helps?", she suggested but you shook your head.
"No, because some of the victims we save are going through similar things as to what I went through. I want to catch the people I can and lock them away. It's not fair for me to be enjoying life while children are getting abused and going through traumatic things", you explained sort of opening up to her.
"Oh sweetie, it's ok to take time for yourself", you shook your head sternly and she let go of the subject. "Alright well is it ok if I give you a hug", it was really sweet that she asked. You nodded your head and she took you into her arms hugging you tightly. You practically melted into her arms as you started to sob letting it out.
...
After a few minutes you backed away wiping your face once again. "Thank you", you said, your voice hoarse from the crying. Instead of responding she simply kissed you on your forehead. "I don't wanna go back to bed yet", you said hoping she would understand. She nodded her head and stayed silent for a second before speaking up.
