I Wonder If Your Therapist Knows [COMPLETED]

Chapter 8

Following your 'session' with Bucky, you spent an hour drafting, and eventually sending a very passive aggressively professional email to the entire staff list in the compound, stating that personal affairs are not something you will be commenting on, and they can direct their queries to Pepper. You smiled as you received one reply only over the rest of the day; Pepper, who just sent you a smiley face. No one spoke to Pepper unless they had to. Not that she wasn't likeable, but she was very much the last person you want telling you off about something.

In the hallways, people gave you that awkward 'hello' smile/grimace, but there was no mention of your email. You knew Bucky had seen it, he was on the staff list, but the radio silence on his end was worrying you slightly. You had expected a message at the very least, but there was nothing.

You had also spent most of the afternoon rewriting your programme for Bucky. Now that you had decided that you were both pursuing this...relationship, you had some edits to do. Mostly, your edits were a plan of action regarding...well, regarding sex.

You made the plan with the intent of discussing it in your next session. And you did, kind of. You eased him in, showing him that you changed his scheduling a little to give him some more freedom (to spend that time with you, you hoped), explaining that it's equally important to spend time with each other and alone, giving him more of a break between sessions because, well, if he was spending his spare time with you, you didn't want him to get sick of your face.

He accepted the changes relatively easily. He queried you when he realised that your edits meant you actually had less sessions planned over the week, but you reminded him he could still ask for extra, and he seemed okay with it.

When you slid over your 'intimacy plan', however, it brought around a bout of silence. You could hear your voice wavering as you tried to explain it, and his expression flitter between intrigued, amused, skeptical and nervous. You tried to explain that it was a vague outline (your more detailed ones got shredded after they made you a bit too warm), and it was more about knowing what was generally expected and involved in a typical relationship, and working through the areas that he was comfortable with, in a sequence that he was comfortable with. Bucky didn't say much, just listened and flicked through the pages when you prompted him.

He asked if you ever made one of these before.

You assured him it was the first time, and only because you didn't want to hinder his progress or make him feel negatively about any aspect of it.

Bucky assured you that it wasn't his first time doing this stuff, and even though you knew he said it to ease your worries, you couldn't stop the pang of jealousy stabbing in your chest momentarily. But you shook it off, smiled, and just reiterated that he was in control of choosing what to do and when, as long as you agreed.

The session ended with Bucky pushing you against your desk and kissing you again.

A couple of nights later, you hadn't seen Bucky, thanks to you scheduling his physio and social time in, but he had texted you a couple of times. You appreciated that. You could tell him a hundred times that you were patient and he was in control, but you couldn't help the fact that you wanted to talk to him and be around him as much as physically possible, which is inevitable in the beginnings of any relationship.

You smiled to yourself everytime you thought about him, and you hoped he did the same.

You were trying to get to sleep, rolling over to readjust your position when you hear your door lock click, and open your eyes to see a big, dark shadow now in your room.

This would startle most people, but yesterday you told Bucky where your room was in case he wanted to find you.

"Buck?" The heavy breathing confirmed your suspicion. You sat up and propped yourself on your elbows as he made his way over to the bed. "You wanna sit?" He replied by crawling in and laying down next to you.