It Follows

Part 9

"Did anything happen between you and Zoya?"

"If you're asking if I fucked her on this trip then the answer is no."

Relief washed over Alina. In the last two weeks she hadn't let herself dwell on any thoughts of Kirigan and Zoya, refusing to let herself get caught in the overwhelming jealousy the couple elicited in her, but now her insides no longer felt constricted. It was like she could breathe again.

"But she did kiss me, Alina, and I didn't stop her."

The world stopped. Pain shot through her, so sharp and intense it almost knocked the breath out of her lungs. She didn't understand how it could hurt so much. It's not like she hadn't been rejected before. Being half-Shu meant there were boys who treated her like dirt in front of others but more than happy to mess around in secret. She'd fallen for it when younger, but over time being treated like dirt had opened her eyes to how they really felt about her. Even Mal, her best friend, and someone who knew her better than anyone else was happy to fool around with other women but balked at the idea of being with her when she'd had a short-lived crush on him. Somehow, however, she'd managed to convince herself that Kirigan was different, that the connection between them was so unique that he would never hurt her the same way like so many others had. But he did, and the sting from his rejection was infinitely worse. Because, despite their unique bond and his proclamations that she was one of a kind, it still wasn't enough for him to want her and her alone. She still wasn't good enough.

He was watching her keenly, waiting, for what she didn't know, and she had no desire to find out. Maybe he wanted to see her fall apart, she wouldn't put it past him.

Head held high, Alina started walking towards her horse. She needed to get out of there, quickly, but suddenly Kirigan was blocking her path. When she tried to sidestep around him he followed suit, refusing to let her leave. When she tried to push him away he held firm, drawing closer, not showing her any mercy as he thwarted her escape.

"Let me go!" she screamed, hating that her voice cracked with emotion. He kept advancing forward, not giving her any space to breathe or think or hold onto any semblance of her pride. Instinctively she motioned her hands to attack him but he gripped them tightly and pulled her against his body.

Angry, she tried to fight him off but her attempts were futile. He was strong, calm, and in control and, unlike her, his face wasn't streaked with tears.

Suddenly his hand snaked around her waist and he was crushing her against his chest, his mouth closing over hers for a heated kiss.

There was no softness in him, no gentleness, and she didn't want that from him anyway. Not anymore.

Rage and passion pulsed through her veins as she returned his kiss with equal fervor, biting his lips, sucking his tongue. Teeth against tongue, nails marking skin. Hot and desperate. He knew how to pleasure her body until she was writhing with want and yearning for more. She didn't know who pulled the other to the ground but soon they were clawing at each other, her back against the cold, wet dirt with Kirigan on top of her. While he ripped her blouse apart, she unsnapped the buckles on his long coat and slid the fabric off his body. As he nipped her skin and peppered her neck with kisses, she dug her nails into his back and wrapped her legs around his thighs. His coldness melted against her heat, fusing them together.

"Alina," he groaned, the sound a guttural moan in the stillness of the night.

She reached down between them to rake her fingers along his erection when he unexpectedly pulled back to look at her. His dark, stormy eyes met hers, his breath ragged and matching her own. "Are you sure?"