𝐈𝐍𝐓𝐈𝐌𝐀𝐓𝐄 𝐇𝐎𝐍𝐄𝐘: 𝐁𝐗𝐁

𝐓𝐫𝐞𝐚𝐬𝐮𝐫𝐞 𝐏𝐓. 𝟐

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𝐂𝐨𝐦𝐞𝐭𝐡𝐚𝐳𝐢𝐧𝐞 𝐗 𝟐𝟏 𝐒𝐚𝐯𝐚𝐠𝐞

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(Frank Childress X Shéyaa Joseph)

Requested by: @K1MADD

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Sheyaa.

This shit was pissing me off and in ways that Frankie couldn't comprehend. It definitely wasn't like he thinks though.

While it isn't the fact he is a virgin, it's the fact that he didn't tell me. I wouldn't have pursued him nor put together a contract with him if I knew he was a virgin. Hell―I wouldn't have even batted an eye.

His being a virgin is fucking up so many things for me. Not only is he inexperienced in general but he also ain't with all the shit I like for sure. Everything that comes with me is too intense for someone like him at this point.

Plus, I feel like I'd be taking advantage of him somehow. Ion know, it's a weird feeling to explain. Overall I don't think its right for me to take his virginity especially while we're in a contract where we have this arrangement to have sex and all.

That's some fucked up shit just to take that shit just because we in this little entanglement. Shit don't sound right at all.

Yet my mind is telling me to go back in that fucking room and give it to him like I should because I feel some type of way about him. And even then I shouldn't feel that way about him. I don't do relationships.

Long story short, somebody had me highly fucked up and my trust is just shot. It's bad enough that I barely get by with my family and shit but that situation was just destructive.

I loved a person so much―too much―that I gave them everything. All the love I could possibly give someone was given to them and I was so dumb to believe that the kindness they reciprocated was the same I was giving out. It was fake and it was a front so they continue taking more of me until there was nothing left.

Up until the moment I caught them in bed with another man, I thought I had something. I thought I was worthy.

It took me a while to get up out of my funk but clearly I got problems if I can't settle down. I got problems since I gotta rely on getting the pleasure I need by tempting the people in I find attractive with money and riches.

The only way I get close to someone now is by being in between their legs and that's fucked up on so many levels. It's like I'm caught up with Frankie though. I couldn't do him like that and it even bothers me when I think about treating him like I do other people.

In the short amount of time that he's been here along with how much we've interacted, I could say truthfully that he's just different. There are things between us which haven't even been revealed, different sides to us that the other hasn't seen. And knowing that and still feeling so deeply about him―that shit is beyond scary.

As I stood outside his door, I just waited. He probably felt embarrassed as hell with the way I just walked out of the room on him. Ion know why I did that in the first place.