Twin Pulse

Solitude

Jakarta, August 2020

Have you ever heard people saying, "I can't live without you" or maybe "I can't live being apart from you." It's very cliched, but do they ever mean it literally...

Beep...Beep...Beep                 

The beeping of the heart monitor seems to grow louder as his pulse weakens...
"Rafa don't leave me, I can't live without you, please. Come back.."     

It all started on that day... July 19th 2019

~~~

~Stella

"Stella! It's time for breakfast stop sleeping!" Nothing like mbak Linda's nagging in the morning, it's almost a routine. "Okay coming!" Half-awake, I get out of my bed and walked to the dining room.  I see Andy and Hamdza talking really loudly, and the new person who just came here. He said his name was Raphael. He will go to the same school as us starting tomorrow. He seems like a quiet guy and never talks much. You know, I'll try to talk to him later. It seems that he's having a hard time before but he will get used to it soon.

 Mbak Linda turned on the TV and switched it to the news. "Good Morning everyone, thank you for tuning in to channel 52, today is very exciting as a lunar eclipse will be happening tonight and can be viewed clearly from Jakarta, so don't miss it." Wow, a lunar eclipse would be nice to watch. 

Hamdza walks up to me and said," Stell do you want to watch the eclipse with me?" I nodded and agreed "Right after I visit my mom okay?" My mom is ill and is being treated in the hospital that's why I am living in an orphanage right now. Hamdza has been here since he was still a baby, so he's the most experienced one here. 

When I first got here, My dad just died of a car accident and my mom fell ill, he was the first one to comfort me, his voice always sounds oddly calming. Hamdza walks up to Raphael and offered to come and watch the eclipse together. Instead, Raphael just gave a cold gaze and walks away. I don't know what happened to him but I rather not interfere. "How could he! Ignoring Hamdza like that!" one of the girls snapped. "Come on he's new, everybody here has been through that phase before, let's just leave him alone for now," Hamdza replied gently.

"Hoi Hamdza do u want to buy some cilor*?" Andy came in and asked, "Cilor? Where?" 
"It's just around that corner, quick! I'll pay." they ran outside the house immediately after that.

Then I saw Raphael going out, "Wait! Where are you going?" he looks at me with his cold eyes and answered, "Somewhere..." I guess he really doesn't talk much...

Well, I don't really like to interfere- "Oh look at the time I should be going to the hospital now" I said to myself.  I get on my bicycle and cycle quickly. I can hear Mbak Linda asking me to be back before 5 in the distance. Typical Mbak Linda.

I arrived At the hospital where my mom is being treated. My mom is diagnosed with serious lung cancer, but I never lose hope that she could be healed. Mbak Linda is the one who has been paying for her hospital bills and I'm really grateful I met her. I got in the elevator and pressed the button to the floor where my mom is being treated

I walked along the hallway and noticed that the surgery room lights on. I had a bad feeling and rushed to my mom's room. It's empty... I panicked and asked a nurse who was outside the room.
"Excuse me have you seen my mother, she is patient number 1709."
"1709? Let me see... Young lady your mother is in surgery right now, I don't know how to break it to you but her condition is worsening all we can do is wait and pray" the nurse answers with a sympathetic face. I waited anxiously, every tick of the clock sounds so loud it's sickening.

Then the sign in front of the room switched off and a group of surgeons comes out. "Are you Miss Rina's family member?" I said yes, "Ma'am I'm sorry to inform you that we can't save your mother, we have tried our best..." I dropped down to my knees and cried.

It is 4 p.m. and my mother's funeral is taking place, "Why must you leave me, mom, first dad left now you too?" I whispered to her in sorrow. Hamdza came to the funeral and said that he's sorry for what happened. Mbak Linda and the others are there too, this is the first time I have felt this lonely in life. Sometimes I wonder what I have done in my life to deserve all this. I ran away and went to the top of an abandoned building. For the first time in life, I felt my life has no meaning. I looked down rethinking everything. "If u want to jump do it quickly" I screamed in shock and looked for the one who said that. It was Raphael! "Who even wanted to jump, please I was just looking at the scenery" I denied him awkwardly, "I heard what happened, I'm really sorry for your loss, if you want you can sit here with me and watch the eclipse," he answered gently.

This was the first time I heard him talk and he actually seems like a nice person. I sat beside him while wiping my tears. We sat there quietly as we waited for the eclipse to fully form.

~~~

Author's note:

*mbak: a word you used to call older women in Javanese
*cilor: or aci telor famous traditional food among students, usually fried with egg and seasoned with powder seasoning on top. (aci is tapioca starch)

(I am new to writing so if you have any suggestions or critics please leave them in the comments section below) (fixed some punctuation error)