Teach You To Love [semi on hold]

2| on my knees

I'm not quite sure how I got here. I'm still baffled how I've made it this far spewing so many lies.

Instead of boarding a plane to Auburn, I hitched one to LA–the ticket was booked way back in May. I'm having my truck shipped because the thought of making a nearly twenty hour drive alone makes me want to scrape my eyes out with a spoon. Then I caught a cab to the UCLA campus. From there, someone showed me to the dorms. And now I'm stuck staring at the cream painted brick walls in disbelief.

The general specifics of how I got from point A to point B are pretty straightforward. But I'm just utterly dumbstruck as to how I managed to get here.

What the hell did I do?

My phone buzzes, but I don't need to check it to see who it is. Fallon has been blowing me up, but I don't blame her for it. If the roles were reversed and she was ignoring me, I would blast her inbox until she had no choice but to call me or mute me. As her self-proclaimed best friend, I can get away with it without coming off as some pathetic sap.

Even though it's pretty fucking pathetic of me to be ignoring her right now. And she has to know I'm ignoring her, too, which is killing me. But what am I supposed to say?

Oh, hey, Fallon. No, I'm not at Auburn. I'm actually at UCLA. Mhm. Fifteen minutes from your place. Yeah, I knew for quite a while, I just chose not to tell you. Oh, and I'm not playing football either. Good talk. See you in class.

Yeah, she's not going to take that well. At least, not at first. But she'll come around. She's got to, once I explain everything.

Fallon's my best friend.

But lately...weird things have been happening. Actually, weird things have been happening for a while.

It started one night at laser tag, all the way back to last fall. It was meant to be a simple game, but when I cornered her, she gave me the look. The I want to get you naked look. Then she got a little closer than we're used to, rubbed her sweet little body against me, and she fucking kissed me. And let me tell you, it was bliss.

Pure. Fucking. Bliss.

I have never kissed a girl like Fallon Sinclair before. And then she shoots me in the side (with a laser beam of course) and runs off giggling, and I'm left covering an erection in the middle of a kids game.

Since then, I've been fucked in the head. I should not be having sex dreams about my best friend. I shouldn't be jealous of her with other guys. But I was. And I still am, even though she's not with anyone at the moment. Just thinking about her at that goddamn Christmas party last year with Liam Phillips...then all the shit I said to her...

I'm lucky she's got a heart of gold. I don't deserve it, but I'm selfish enough to take her forgiveness.

Like clockwork, my phone goes off again. Sighing, I retrieve it from my pocket to silence it, but my blood runs cold when I see who's calling.