Sit Back, Relax, Relapse

Goodnight, sleep tight.

Sunny blinked. He couldn't sleep again. Turning around to his nightstand, he searched for a clock. It's way past midnight. Tomorrow is gonna suck for sure.

Sleep wasn't coming to him as easily as it used to, which is bad because he is starting school (no more homeschooling) soon and he's trying to get a regular schedule because like hell he'll fall asleep in the middle of class, that'd be embarrassing.

Sunny is trying. Sleep be damned, he's going to be healthy again.

... but then again, it would be so much easier if he took sleeping pills agai- no, you don't need these anymore.

....

... Maybe-

Maybe, this is his mind's way of punishing him for doing almost nothing else than sleep and dream his days away since Mari's dea-

.....

It's okay, he told himself, you're okay, there's nothing to be afraid of. Take a deep breath.

He's been going to therapy since he moved away from Faraway Town, trying to take it a day at a time. No more staying in his room for weeks on end, no more hiding or running away. He's been getting better. Or at least that's what his mother says.

He wants to believe her.

But some days it's just so hard.

Sunny is trying, he really is. He's allowing himself to feel emotions again, after years of denying he ever had them in the first place. He's been doing everything his therapist says, so why is this so hard? Why is he feeling so miserable?

Why can't you just be happy?

......

"Recovery is not a linear road" on one of his most recent sessions, that's what his therapist said. "Don't be too hard on yourself. Progress, even if just a little, is still progress." Sunny nodded, made a mental note on it, folded it and saved it for later in a little corner of his mind.

Later can apply to right now he supposes. Take out the thought to unfold it and internalize it.

....

Sunny wonders if Headspace is the same, since OMORI is kind of gone now. Or well, that's what he believes anyways, not like he's visited since telling the truth. He won't start now.

He thought about his friends, his real ones. Did they forgive him? Will they ever forgive him? Sunny is not sure if he wants to know, and frankly doesn't mind if they don't. He just hopes they're not too hard on Basil if they see him again.

Speaking of Basil- they send each other letters now, to check upon the other. On his last letter, Basil said he hadn't talked with the rest of the group, so maybe they're still processing everything. Not that he blames them of course.

Sunny would like to visit someday. Even if his friends don't want to see him, he could at least pay a visit to Basil. He's the last person there that still likes him, or at least that's what he thinks. Letters don't say otherwise.

Maybe they could visit their old tree house again. Hopefully clean it because dang it sure needed it. Or go for some Gino's Pizza and play cheeky music in the stereo, then go to Kel and Hero's house to play a bit with Hector and plan a sleepover. That would be fun maybe.

........

Would Mari be proud of him? Of the progress he's done?

.... He hoped so.

........

Actually, she would. She was always so kind and understanding. She would want him to be happy, because she's Mari. And that's just how Mari is.

Sunny just has to keep holding on. He knows it. He'll keep trying because he wants to get better and to honor Mari. There's no need to hide.

He may not be okay right now, but he will be. He hopes he will. And he will make it a reality.

Sunny ends up sleeping right away.

Of course she would be proud. That's just how Mari is.

==============================
Author's notes:
Heeeey bestie <3 *(pushes you down the stairs)*

HI so um, thanks for reading! I know the fandom is kinda dead atm so I'm very thankful someone decided to check out whatever the hell this is supposed to be LOL

Cover Art & Header belongs to OMOCAT