Her Diary

Friends and more

Cas' Pov.

  I shut my room door and make my way to deans room. I push the elevator Button and wait. god I'm nervous. Wait, why am I nervous? I'm just hanging out right it's not like- wait, SHIT! What if he wants to, Ya know do the do? Ok ok calm your self cas, calm. the elevator opens after what seems like forever and I walk in press the button for his floor, the doors shut.

   I knock on the door. I steady my breathing. The door opens, and the calm I just took so much time getting, melts. fuck. "come on in cas! Got some snacks, had to sneak them in though. they really don't like fatty food here." Dean showed me around, the bedroom, dinning room, ect.. " So what do you wanna do now?" I ask. he thinks for a second, " how about this" he says smoothly. he then smashes his lips on mine. I freeze, it takes me a few seconds to put myself into the kiss. it was slow but strong. He pulls back gently, " so I'm guessing you've never kissed a guy then?" Dean asked with a smirk on his face. my face was fully red at this point. "Y-yeah." I answer. he laughs slightly at my shyness then he kisses me again, this time more heated and passionate. My arms wrap around his neck and his hand rest on my waist, the other he gently places on the cheek. I didn't want it to end but yet I pulled away, I look at him, and rest my forehead against his, there was a silence, it wasn't uncomfortable but it lingered until I finally broke it. "What are we going to do.." I sit up and look at him, he gives me a sad smile, "I don't know, I know this is sudden and I understand if you don't really want this." He looked down as if in shame, I placed my hand on his cheek " I want this, please believe me I do. But I don't know what to do, we are kinda scheduled to be pitted against each other in three days. And it scares me, dean." He pulls me to him and I lay my head on his chest and he leans back so I'm laying on him. "I know, it scares me too." I fell asleep with his arms around me.