I kissed her but...

I kissed her but I'm not sure

Was it because others were watching?

I kissed her but I'm not sure

It happened, just like that, nothing to say, nothing to add....
It happened... And that makes it worse

I kissed her but I'm not sure

Is it because I'm scared?

I kissed her but I'm not sure

A moment and suddenly our lips against each other, moving inexperienced
We pull back and look in each others eyes... A small smile on her lips while I tell her it was my first kiss

I kissed her but I'm confused

I wanna cry, my stomach feels heavy... A pit forming not wanting to go away, tears threading to spill but I hold them back... Nobody to turn to

I kissed her but I'm confused

Not just once but twice, I kissed her, tounges dancing with one another

I kissed her but I don't know

I wanna cry, I don't know why, tears threading to spill, nose starting to run, head hurts from holding back the pain

I kissed her but it felt wrong

Was it the alcohol running through our veins, making our brain mushy?
Was it the curiousity wanting to know what it feels like to kiss someone and the brain not being able to work, the alcohol making us brave?
Was it the braveness trying to show the rest that we would do it?
Was it... Was it maybe just the moment?

I kissed her but it felt so wrong

Tears held back, mind wanting to forget... Stomach aches, a constant reminder

I kissed her but I'm stupid

Was it the words said by a friend that she might still be in love with somebody else?
Was it me just not wanting to hurt her feelings?
Was it me just being stupid for leaning in and connecting our lips?

I kissed her but I want to cry, want the tears to flow

Regret when it happened the second time
Regret after waking up
Regret throughout the day
Regret follows wherever I go
Regret as constant reminder in the back of my mind

I kissed her but I want to cry, tears slowly start to spill from my eyes

Shit! I kissed her and I cried.