Dawning Love (Completed but unedited) (First Book in His Light series)

Chapter Eighteen Unedited

TRIGGER WARNING!

Dawn's POV

He stalks towards me, taking his belt off with a smirk. I shake my head, pushing myself further into the corner he trapped me in. He grabs me by my hair, dragging me to the hard bed and throwing me onto it. I scream, begging for him to stop as tears stream down my frozen cheeks. Then, he takes my innocence. My love for life. My hope. My voice.

I sit up, screaming and thrashing around. I fall off the bed, screaming as tears stream down my face. Jay quickly comes to my side and I throw myself at him, seeking comfort and safety. The door gets thrown open, seeing my sobbing mess in Jay's arms. He rocks us back and forth frantically, panic on his face as he kisses my head and shushes me softly. Kieran comes up behind me and softly hugs me from behind as I cry.

"Hey, baby, look at me. He's not here, he'll never hurt you again. I'd kill myself if it would ensure your safety." Jay says quietly, brushing my hair away from my face. My uncle and cousin stare at me in shock, just realizing how bad it really was. My eyes dart around the room as I sob.

"D-Dawn?" Emmie whimpers, causing me to cough and wipe my face roughly.

"I'm fine. Emmie. Go back to sleep." My voice wavers, and both my brother and Jay's arms tighten around me. Elijah shows up and sees me trying to quietly sob as Emmie pesters me with questions. He hoists her onto his hip and takes her back to her room two floors down. I pull away from them and don't look at anyone as I hiccup and brush away my tears. I head into the bathroom, pulling my hair up into the messiest ponytail I have ever seen. I brush my teeth and go back out into the room, pulling on sneakers.

"I'm going for a walk. Alone." I mutter, going around Jay. He gently grabs my elbow.

"You can talk to us, we're here for you." He reminds me, I try to keep my composure.

"I don't want to talk about it, Jayden. I'm tired of everyone asking me to tell them what happened. I relive it every night, I don't want to relive it during the day as well." I hiss, brushing past my family. They watch as I storm down the stairs and walk out of the mansion, turning to go into the leaf filled yard. I crunch past all the guards I know are hiding up in the trees, and storm away from the light and go straight into the unknown dark.

"Why do I always have to fall in love with gang leaders? The nosy bastards! Always wanting to know who and what is on my mind and when it crosses it. Maybe I want to have some privacy." I utter, trying to direct all my anger, hatred, resentment, and horror onto what happened inside. I don't succeed. Tears cloud my vision as I see his face in my mind, smirking as I scream in fear. I fall to my knees, sobbing my heart out. I rock back and forth, holding my arms across my chest as if to hold it together.

I hear someone drop from the tree and they hesitantly walk towards me. "You're Dawn, aren't you?" A soft, musical voice murmurs. I look up, startled as I wipe my tears. A woman in about her thirties smiles at me softly.

"I'm Mariah, Anna's mom. Let me help you. You seem lost, and don't worry. No one can hear us." She says, sitting down beside me. I cry softly, rubbing the tears off my face.

"I don't know how to tell my family what happened! I told Jay, and he supported me, but what about my family? I can't tell them because I know they'll go hunt him down, and I really don't want Emmie to hear." I cry, she rubs my back and pulls me into her.

"Emmie's asleep. Elijah texted me earlier to inform me about who was sleeping so we know who's awake and who isn't. You can take everyone into Jay's office, if it isn't destroyed, and you guys can talk. If you can't say it aloud, sign it. Yes, I know that you can sign. I do lots of research on people I am protecting." She says, her Spanish accent leaking through for just a moment. I slowly nod.

"O-okay." I stammer, she rubs my back for a second more before standing up and holding a hand out to help me. I take it, and she pulls me to my feet.

"I'll walk you back. Go and tell them. They'll understand and support you." She says with belief and we walk silently back to the door. I hug her quickly as a thank you before going back inside. I see Jay pacing with his head in his hands in the living room and everyone else is sitting down, silently watching Jay.

"I want to tell you what happened. Not in the dream, but everything." I say, making everyone's gaze snap to me. I nervously lean on the wall as Jay comes over to me and pulls me into a hug. I relax into him, my eyes already getting droopy.

"Y-you want to tell us what happened?" Hudson asks in disbelief, I nod.

"Yes. Jay, can we go up to your office to tell them, so Emmie won't hear?" I ask, he nods and takes my hand. I look up into his dark eyes full of worry and hug him again. He relaxes just a tiny bit and I look back at my family.

"Let's go." I murmur, following Jay up the stairs and towards the two doors I saw the morning after I was almost... raped again. I almost choke at the forced thought, but I shake it away from me with a deep breathe. Jay opens the large, heavy doors and I sit down in his desk chair. I spin around as everyone sits down in front of the desk, and Jay smiles in amusement at me. He sits down on the arm rest, making me stop spinning. I frown and look at me expectant family. I sigh, anxious to get this over.

"That day, I was going grocery shopping. My car broke down on the side of the road and then I was kidnapped. Drugged and tied up in a van, half conscious. When we arrived, they threw me into this cell like room. I was chained to the wall, had a small bed, with a blanket that did nothing against the cold. Every day, I was abused and tortured. Every other day I was given food and a couple sips of water. During that first week, I got used to those beatings. But one day, he decided to rape me. A few days later, I saw a few things I shouldn't have and then I was found the way I was. Broken, beaten, naked, and freezing." I say, not looking anyone in the eye.

"He was the leader of a gang, and the people who sent in that anonymous tip about my whereabouts was an enemy gang that found me in the middle of their attack. So, not every gang is bad, but I'm still traumatized by what happened those two weeks." I say, rolling up my pant leg.

"This is a bullet wound scar. Some guy got angry that I wasn't screaming yet, so he shot me. The knife scars were by you know who." I say, before letting my pant leg drop. Jay gently takes my hand and kisses the back of it. It's dead silent, so I take that as judgement. Tears blur my sight and fall slowly down my cheeks.

"Dawn, come here." Kieran says quietly, I get to my feet and walk over to him. He pulls me onto his lap and I hug him, burying my face into his chest. Carter wraps his arms around me from my side as Hudson stares at us in total shock.

"You were... raped?" He asks, I nod my head.

He sighs, putting his head in his hands. "I failed. I promised Kate and Hunter that I would keep you safe, and I fucking failed!" He says, his voice getting louder by the second. I flinch when he raises his hands, sorrow enters his eyes.

"Fuck." He cursed and quickly left. I cried silently, and Jay just sat there, watching me patiently as I both comforted and got comfort. I pulled away from my family and sat beside Carter, clutching his hand.

"There's something else... that I think you should know." I begin, my heart racing with dread and I look up at Jay with sorrow.

"I miscarried a month after the incident." I say, a fresh flow of tears flowing down my face. Everyone stares at me in disbelief, as I start to sob.