THE REALMS OF KAHILWAYAN: Alunsina Chronicles

Chapter 3 - Juana

Clara and Kulas, their son, Miquel and his wife, Maria, and their children, Juana and Felipe, on their knees praying the rosary around 'Sina, who was in her bed. She was conscious but she was too frail to open her eyes. She would join in the prayers, faintly mumbling the words in between gasps of air. It has nearly been a week that she was confined here, bedridden, and every day, she became weaker and weaker.

Juana at some point stood up to replace the melted "perdon" surrounding Sina's room, dozens of them on the nogging of walls, the window sills, on tables and chairs, some on the floor, not leaving any nook or corner of the bedroom unlighted. She did it ceremoniously and tried to conserve the matchsticks lighting as much as she could with one stick, and then she would tuck it away and light another one.

'Sinas room looked, fully lit with "perdon" of different colors, was like an altar. She looked around to check if she missed one or two. She saw one by the window, a yellow "perdon", that was half-way melted but extinguished by the wind passing through the gaps in the window. She went and reached out for the window to shut it tight.

But as she was reaching out, seeing through the gap, she noticed what seemed to be two little children standing by the edge of the cliff. The dark fog was making it impossible for her to recognize who they were. She thought they were Lito and Carlos, kids of their closest neighbor. But they were 2 kilometers away. It was impossible for them to be there on the cliff at this time of the night, especially when there seems to be a typhoon coming.

She tried to peer closely through the gap. And she noticed that they were waving at her. They seem to be calling her, signaling her to go there.

At 10 years old, Juana was more mature than his elder brother. She spent more time with Clara, her grandmother, and 'Sina than Felipe. The way she moves, even the way she speaks, her poise, sadly, the way she prefers to dress, were a combination of Clara and 'Sina. Her brother would tease her "gurang" or "la-un", and she would just give them a cold shoulder, and walk away. She would go to the dirty kitchen where Clara was more often, cooking the next meal. Or, when Clara was out with Kulas in the fields, she would go to 'Sina's room where they would spend hours braiding each other's hair or playing with Apuy 'Sina's "sungka".

But no matter how mature she seems to be, her curiosity was still like that of a naïve child. She shut the window close, tighter than it was, and lighted that one last unlit yellow "perdon". After she blew the flint out of the matchstick, she sneaked out of the room. The rest of her family were deep into their prayers that they did not notice her leaving the room.

She grabbed one of the kerosene lamps that lit the kitchen, and adjusted the brightness enough to light her path. She excited the dirty kitchen and out to the veranda. She could have taken the front door which was already in the direction of, and went directly to, the cliff where the two little children were calling her. But it was near Sina's room and the door was squeaky, and that would announce to her family that she was going somewhere in the middle of the night. She didn't want that, and so she took the longer path through the dirty kitchen, to the veranda, down several levels of stairs into the backyard, went around the house, through a thicket, and out into the paved street and across it.

Lito and Carlos were of her age, and they went to school together. She thought she didn't want to miss out what they were up to in the middle of the night, and so, she needed to find out. She knew her way, it's their farmlands after all.

The dark fog was so thick that the light of the lamp only allowed her to see where she was stepping. She tried to readjust the brightness, but it only made little difference. She could not see a foot or so through the dark fog around her. For a second, she doubted her resolve, she wanted to go back. But her curiosity got the better of her. After all, she thought, she knew her way. This was their farmlands. This was her playground. She remembers how her grandpa said it so that she owns everything her eyes can see. And so, she tread on.

As she went farther and farther away, she lost sense of how far she was from their house. She could barely see the ground she was stepping on as she tried to raise the lamp higher for more visibility of the area, following, by memory, the direction towards Lito and Carlos was calling her.

She was not afraid in the beginning, but the uncertainty of where she was going when all she could see was darkness ahead, toyed with her imagination. 'Sina told her stories about "anitos", especially "engkantos", she called them. She had told her that these were made up stories, but Apuy 'Sina told those stories vividly. And now, it is in her mind, and as she took every step away from the house and into the deep dark fog, she recalled these monsters in her mind. She could not compose herself. Fear started to consume her. Paralyzed in the middle of the fields, in the dark fog, she wanted to scream. But she remembered what Apuy 'Sina told her, "they lurk in the shadows and they only follow the sound of your breath, when you inhale and exhale. It gets deeper and deeper as fear consumes you. And the deeper it gets, the louder your breath becomes. That is how they can sense life. So, be still."

And so, without a choice, consumed with fear, Juana closed her eyes and took a deep breath, counting one to ten, as Apuy 'Sina has taught her. "Be still," she remembered her saying. One, be still, two, be still, three, be still, she counted with her in her mind, until she felt calm, and opened her eyes. She raised the lamp higher to see a wider area, and she took a step and never stopped until she reached the cliff where she saw Lito and Carlos.

"Lito?! Carlos?!" She called out. "Are you there?"