Sana

Kabanata 11

Kabanata 11

Wait

Do you think once you love someone, you will always love them? Or do you think love can fade away with time?

If you love someone, is unfaithfulness/cheating something that can be forgiven?

How can you know if someone is having a hard time with you even if the whole viewpoint you did is to love him? 

And... How can you know if someone is started to falling out in love with you? Would you let him go or would you fight to get his love back again to you?

I broke down in tears whenever I remember what their new maid confessed to me earlier. Pilit kong hindi maniwala Dahil kilala ko si Zanth. Ako lang ang mahal non. Ako lang. But in my case right now… Hindi ko alam kung saan ako makikinig. Sa puso ko ba o sa utak?

My mind always said that he truly did that. But my heart says he isn't cheating. Kaya ba siya hindi nagpaparamdam sakin ng tatlong araw? I can't help but overthink. Para akong mababaliw kakaisip. Hinding hindi iyon magagawa ni Zanth. Kilala ko siya. He loves me so much. I called him again pero parang nawalan na ako ng pag-asa dahil hindi naman siya sumasagot. How could he ignore me? Paano niya ikinaya iyon? 

I buried my face in my pillow, trying to suppress my tears. Naisip ko rin na baka prank lang iyong sinabi ng maid nila. Baka binibiro lang ako nun at kasabwat niya si Zanth. Baka may bonggang pa surpresa siya sa akin dahil malapit na iyong 7th anniversary namin. Pero paano kapag totoo talaga iyon? Maybe I cannot encompass the pain in my heart.

But is it really fine to cease our connections? No calls. No texts. Deactivations in his social media accounts. And is it normal to being ghost off by him? Normal ba yung tatlong araw na walang paramdam galing sa kaniya? I wanted to cry so bad but I also think that maybe he's just busy. Pero kahit na… Hindi naman siya ganito noon. Before when he's busy, he always makes time for me, to us… He finds a way to have a bond with me.

"Seirra, this is not the right time to drama! Marami kapang aaralin. Cheer up! Hindi iyon magagawa ni loves." I perked up myself.

Besides, he told me he never leave me behind. Knowing him? He didn't even break a single promise to me. Tsaka marami pa kaming pangarap. He even proposes and that means, he's very sure to me.

"Wala kang dapat ipag-alala, Seirra Veradona." I stated again.

I can wait for him. I can wait for his explanations about his sudden departures. I can wait as long as I can. Kaya ko siyang hintayin gaya ng paghihintay niya sa sagot ko nung nililigawan niya pa ako. Wala naman sigurong masama kung hihintayin ko ang eksplenasyon niya.

Furthermore, waiting for itself is beneficial to us. It tries faith, exercises patience, trains submission, and endears the blessing when it comes. I will keep the faith. I don’t know if I can live without him in my life, no matter what, I will keep waiting for him. No matter what.

Author's Note:

Just a small kabanata. This is just a teaser for the following heavy chapters. Char. Enjoy reading!