while in New York

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𝓢𝓾𝓰𝓪 𝓟𝓞𝓥

It's been a week since I was in New York. Like the depressed, I went to school and didn't talk to anyone. I didn't understand English and had difficulty understanding the lessons.

Every day was like the day before and sometimes it got worse. I was a boy of about 19 years old and I was afraid of a strange city.
Every day 2 boys invited me to a place where I don't accept their request.
I was on my way home when the two boys followed me. Those who were someone that weak students as I was afraid of them.

"Are you Japanese?!" One of them said and I tried not to answer.

"Is it true that Japanese boys are cute?"

"Why don't you talk? Are you dumb?" He said with a laugh.

"Let's talk for a while. Let's have something to eat. Do you hear me?" Came and don't stand in front of me.

" Yes." I said calmly.

"Let's have some juice together," said one of them.

They took me by force and we sat in the cafe and gave our orders.

"I'm going to the bathroom" I went to the bathroom and came back.

"Well tell me about yourself," they said.

"I can't speak much English ... My name is Koushi Sugawara and as you know I'm Japanese," I said and drank my juice.

"Glad to meet you. My name is Alex and my friend is Lucas."

"Nice to meet you"

"You have a very good and slim body. Do you do any special exercise?"

"When I was in Japan, I was on the volleyball team ..." I suddenly felt nauseous and ate more juice.

They were talking when I said, "Excuse me ... I'm not feeling well ... can I go home?"

" what happened?"

"I have a headache .. I want to go home sooner"

"It's nothing. Put your head on the table. It's because of the closed air. If you put your head on the table, you will get better." I didn't understand what he was saying and I got up and left.

I was very ill and just running. I wanted to go home.

I don't want to be here. I don't want to! Everything has been going badly since we came here.
Daichi! Help.
I entered the house with tears in my eyes and hurried to the bathroom.

"What happened?! KOUSHI!!" My mother came to me.

I throw up in the sink and sat on the floor.

"What happened? Are you Okay? Let me get you some water."

I became angry and cried, shouting, "WHY THE HELL DID YOU BRING ME? I DON'T WANT TO. YOU'RE KILLING ME. I WANT TO GO BACK. TAKE ME BACK TO JAPAN. LEAVE ME ALONE."

My mother came up to me with a glass of water.

"It's nothing, everything will be fine--" I threw down the glass.

"NO! IT'S NOT RIGHT! YOU RUINED EVERYTHING. I HAVE NOTHING LEFT" I just shouted.

Why didn't I tell him earlier? Why didn't I tell Daichi earlier that I wanted to go to New York? If I had said it earlier, it wouldn't be like this now. I don't have the number of any of my Japanese classmates. They took my SIM card and got an American SIM card. It was obvious that my father didn't want this relationship for me. Why do parents decide everything arbitrarily?

"Koushi, try to get up," my mother said, holding out her hand.

"I don't want to.." I got up myself and went to my room, but my head was dizzy and I fell to the ground. I gradually lost consciousness.

"KOUSHI! EMERGENCY..." I heard nothing more.

It was black everywhere, and a face appeared from afar.

"Suga! Wake up. Suga. Wake up. It's time to wake up. How much are you sleeping!" I opened my eyes to see Daichi.

I was so happy. I was very happy and all I did was hug him.

"Daichi! Youre yourself, right?! Daichi. I missed you. I didn't want this to happen-"

"Suga?! What do you say? Calm down. Come on," Daichi said with a laugh.

"I love you so much. I don't want to leave anymore." I said.

"So you better wake up," Daiichi said very seriously and left the room.

It blurred everywhere and I saw direct light.

"Food poisoning" I heard someone's voice.

I opened my eyes.
I was in the hospital.

"KOUSHI! Better mood? Why are you crying?" My father said.

Crying? I cry? I didn't say anything .... it doesn't matter anymore because .... why?

He taught me how to love, but not how to stop

𝓓𝓪𝓲𝓬𝓱𝓲 𝓟𝓞𝓥

I was training awfully at the club when a coach came and called me.

"Sawamura. What happened? Why are you like this in these few days?" The coach said and I wiped my sweat with my clothes.

"I know it might be hard to train without your friend, but you have to get used to the situation. Go and rinse your face and get some air out and come back. Quick," the coach said angrily, and I left.

I sat outside the club for a while.

Suga will not return. What should I do? I mean, should I forget it? He doesn't answer my phone anymore. His phone was off every time I called. It didn't matter to me anymore. Life doesn't mean anything to me. All the feeling I had was taken away from me. Suga died for me. I no longer have a boy named Koushi Sugawara in this world.
I was thinking that suddenly voice return me to real life.

"Sawamura!" Whenever I was alone, Michimiya would drop her friends and come to me.

" Yes?"

"How are you? You wasn't in a good mood during this time. I said if I talk to you for a while, you will get better." Michimiya said.

"Well, I'm not .... of course it will pass .... I'm getting better" I smiled very nonsensically.

"Sawamura! Are you really good?"

"No, I don't think so," I said in a poker face.

"Ooh! Sawamura, don't be upset. One day you will forget." Why has Michimiya become so kind? Is she looking for an opportunity to have a relationship with me?

It doesn't matter to me what happened. Suga left me without thinking about me. Why?

"Can you leave me alone?" I said.

"Oh okay," Michimiya stepped aside.

Michimiya did something we had a relationship with each other at school broke up. I don't like to get too close to her.

"I know you're not gay!" Michimiya whispered.

"What?!" I said.

"Nothing. Sawamura! I ..... Now Sugawara is no longer in Japan .... he certainly will not come back, I don't want to upset you but .... But ... what can I say? .... I LOVE YOU!TAKE CARE OF ME TOO! He isn't here for you and you have no way of communicating with him. Daichi. Can you be my boyfriend? "Michimiya said shyly. The first time she officially expressed interest in me, did she call me 'Daiichi'?!

It was the first time I saw her so red and she called me Daiichi.

I don't know what to say in this situation.

"Let me think ..." I said skeptically.

Will Suga return or not? Why am I not like before. Why can't I laugh? Or why can't I cry? Can I forget it if I cry? I should be able to forget it because....

It hurts every day, the absence of someone who was once there.

______________________
To be continue...
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