Only if I could've

Chapter 1

It's been 4 months.

I don't wanna believe it, and I never will. And i'll continue to believe this is all a big dream where I'll wakeup with you arguing with me about something silly as usual, or you bitching about how my tie isn't on the right way. Or you mumbling your head off about something. It's too quite. But at the same time the silence is so loud.

-5 months ago-

Bakugo's POV

"Kacchan! open up!"
I groaned as I turned to my side grabbing my phone and checking the time *6:52 am* *deku: 6 missed calls* "Who the fuck is at my house this early in the fucking morning, for fucks sake" I think. I sit up, dizzy and groggy, as I stand up and stumble a bit still awakening from my slumber. I walk downstairs to my flat looking just as messy as I had left it. Walking to the door I sigh in annoyance opening it "You've got two fucking seconds to tell me what's so important your waking me up for" It took him a moment to notice but there was deku at his front door.
"Goodmorning!" he said as he pushed himself into bakugo's house
"I never fucking said you can c-"
"oh my gosh it is so disgusting in here, do you never clean?" deku said with a hand on his hip
"then do something about it" I said in an angry voice glaring at him
"fine I will" he walked over to my living room and started picking up the dirty plates and left over good from two days ago
"What the fuck, I wasn't being fucking serious. I cant do it my damn self!" I grabbed on to his hand taking the pile of plates from him, he just watched me confused as it had took me a moment to realize I was still holding his hand. I swatted it away with a growl and slight blush and started heading to my kitchen setting the plates down. "What are you here for anyways deku"
"oh yeah!" he chirped up "I wanted to let you know our agency has scheduled another signing for us!"
"are you fucking kidding me" I really didn't wanna do anything today, or tomorrow, or the next day, or the day after that besides relax and train.
"yeah I know! super exciting" he said with the biggest smile on his face. I couldn't lie, I would do almost about anything to be able to make him smile like that every day for the rest of his life. I don't deserve that though. After everything I did to him... I can never forgive myself for it, And everything else that happened back in our Ua and middle school days. I started to doze off in my own thoughts as I noticed a hand waving in front of my face
"earth to kacchan!"
he said waving his hand in front of my face
"yeah yeah whatever i'll be there" i said cleaning the dishes off.
"okay! I have to go meet Uraraka for breakfast but I'll text you!" he said walking out the door.
"maybe I can get another hour or two of sleep in before I head to the agency" I thought to myself. To do more paper work because I broke a dudes foot for trying to trip me. "Stupid fucking paperwork, stupid fucking people..." I thought to myself before crashing down onto my bed into a deep slumber.

"I AM HERE" "I AM HERE" "I AM H-"
I threw my alarm clock across the room making it shut up almost immediately. *9:00* The clock reads. I get up and stretch remembering today's earlier events as I scroll through my phone ignoring the messages and news articles. I throw it back down on the bed and get up slowly making my way to the bathroom to brush my teeth and attempt to fix my hair.
"are you fucking kidding me" I sigh knowing I hadn't done any laundry during the weekend so I would be wearing the same shit I wore last week. Angrily, I put it on and head out the door to my agency. I prefer to walk because it gives me an excuse to not get there on time. As i'm walking I see everyone staring at me taking pictures and gasping. "The usual". I think to myself. Until I heard something that caught my attention.
"There's no way it's true" murmuring began around the crowd
"I never took him for that kind of guy"

"Has he heard about it yet?" I hear more whispering as it starts to tick me off.

Then what sets me off is the click of a camera