Forget to Love

Chapter 5 - The confession

"Hey uh— Sabishi-chan," he started. His emotions were welling up in his chest again and he felt like he was gonna explode. Something had changed inside and he was almost scared to figure out what it was. It was difficult to put into words. He dug his hands into his pockets because of his nerves. Some large object pressed against his hand, and he suddenly remembered what he bought at the concession stand.

"I uh... I got this for you. I thought you'd like it," he said quietly, pulling out a large chocolate bar. He was glad it wasn't melted. He handed it to her and she gingerly took it like it was fragile. She stared down at the candy like it was a dying fish. She looked heartbroken.

"Just... to pay you back. I wanted to give you something that wasn't too big, 'cause I knew you would refuse it otherwise."

"... You really shouldn't have, Hitori-kun, I— I like giving gifts to my friends... but when they give something to m-me... I—" She stopped.

"It's really not that big of a deal," he said casually with a shrug. They stood together for a few seconds, and she quietly thanked him. He didn't understand why she was upset over something as simple as a chocolate bar. She'd probably get over it.

They said their goodnights and parted. Hitori wasn't satisfied though, and every step was like torture. He was going to say more and he let himself get distracted by a chocolate bar. He needed to tell her how he was feeling, or he was going to miss his chance. This was the big moment. Besides, he didn't have anything to lose. How much could words hurt anyway?

"Sabishi-chan," he turned, ignoring his heart hammering in his chest. She looked back at him. Her blue eyes twinkled. He had to be strong like the soldier in the movie. "There's going to be a festival on Monday, and—" he stopped. He took a step forward. "I was hoping you would—" he took another step. "Maybe if you were interested—" he took one last step so that he was an arm's reach from her. She stared into his eyes and smiled like he was acting silly. "Would you like to go with me? To the festival? Just us?"

At the last question, her smile disappeared. "You mean... like a date?"

His face burned so hot he thought it would catch fire, but he spoke as confidently as possible. "Yes. Just us... on a date," he finished. Everything clicked into place. Everything was right in the world. But Sabishi looked like something had gone terribly wrong.

"N-No, you—" she struggled like she was in shock, clutching the chocolate bar against her chest, her red bow still askew on her head. "You weren't supposed to fall in love with— I'm not—"

"What are you talking about?" His heart had dropped at her words, and he was pretty sure a few stars had fallen from the sky.

"You seemed happy with— with the others. You seemed like you made such good friends, and it made me... so happy! That's what really mattered to me!" A tear formed at the corner of her eye. "That's what I cared about... So why..." the tear fell down her cheek like a droplet of rain. "Why does that have to be ruined?"

"What? How is that ruined?"

"Because you're spending your time with me instead of the others. You weren't meant to waste your love on me..."

He struggled for words. So suddenly, the world had been flipped upside down. Nothing made sense. More tears flowed down her cheeks, breaking his heart. "I'm not wasting anything on you, Sabishi-chan. I truly enjoy being around you!"

She turned away. "It's my fault. I— I cared about you too much. I tried to hide it but— the world wanted to punish me."

Hitori was silent.