Kicked Out || Reddie

awkward and rushed

⚠️warning: brief mentioning of self harm⚠️

~ two months later ~

Eddies POV

My crush on Richie has been steadily growing ever since I first realized how I felt about him. At first, it was a really small crush and I didn't think about it too much, but now, it constantly plagues my thoughts and I'm super fucking awkward around Richie. Like, I can't get out a full sentence without blushing and I'm constantly stammering around him. It's really pathetic, if I'm being honest.

But today we have school, so I really do need to figure out how to put my feelings aside and act normal.

"Hey Ed's," I hear Richie say the second I sit down in my seat. "Did you do the homework? I totally forgot to do it."

I can feel my cheeks turn red the second he called me Ed's. And to think that I used to find it annoying.

I try to ignore the blush I can feel getting even more red on my cheeks. "Ummm... yeah. Yeah, I did it." Richie seems to sense my complete awkwardness and just nods. "You can copy it, if you want?"

Richie just laughs. "Nah, it's fine. I already have so much late work that one homework assignment won't matter."

"You sure?" Richie nods as if it truly doesn't matter to him. I kind of adore that about him: his carefree nature and how he just does whatever he fucking what if he doesn't want to do something, then he'll be stubborn in a way that's so Richie and- fuck. I'm doing it again.

Richie looks awkwardly at me and opens his mouth. He closes it and opens it again and I can tell that there's something he desperately wants to say.

"What?"

Richie sighs. "Alright, fine. Don't get all offended or whatever, and maybe I'm looking for problems where they don't exist, but are you, like, mad at me or something," he asks me. He looks nervous as he continues, "you haven't really done anything but you've been weirdly distant and honestly it feels like every time we talk its super awkward or rushed or something."

Awkward silence settles around us as soon as he finishes his rant. I can feel my face heating up, because I know he's picked up on my extreme awkwardness. Ugh, what a mess.

"Oh, um, no... I'm not mad at you or anything." With this, Richie looks incredibly relieved and he sits up straighter, almost as if there was a huge weight weighing him down thats just been lifted off his shoulders. "It's just..." I trail off, not sure what I should say. Honestly obviously not an option, and I need to tell him something so that he doesn't think I'm trying to be a complete dick towards him.

"Not to be super blunt, but is it about the whole..." he motions to ugh his head to his left wrist. "Because if it is, I totally get it. It's understandable that it totally freaking you out."

"Is it about...? No, god no. I know I'm a shitty friend but I'm not that shitty of a friend." I say. I don't know why he would even think that that would change anything about our friendship.

He looks down. "I know, but, I know it's a lot. I know I'm kind of a pain in the ass."

"Shut the fuck up. You are not a pain in the ass. I'm sorry for being so weird lately, and I promise it's nothing to do with that." I try to reassure him.

I smile at him, and am rewarded with a smile so sweet that my heart melts.