3:09

CHAPTER 13 - THE MERCIFUL

"Coffee?" she asked.

"No, I'm fine..." he mumbled.

"Can I get you something?"

Aaron squinted his eyes and uncharacteristically turned his head. "No... I'll be alright for now..."

"Okay then" she gladly remarked.

He sat with a perfect posture and laser-eye contact. Both of their palms were rigid as they found themselves on opposite ends of the dinner table, however, she could sense his calmness and control. Maybe that's what he wants me to think? Cara thought to herself. What game is he trying to play?

"I think you should ring up work. Tell them you're not gonna make it today..." Cara recommended.

He nodded his head, "Well, you know me, I emailed them about five seconds after you called."

He ascended from the chair after awkwardly looking around the kitchen.

"Where are you going?" she asked upon noticing minor discomfort around his collar bone.

"It's too stuffy in here, don't you think?"

Aaron moved to the kitchen and pushed the sliding window open. "New toaster?" He studied the appliance with immense detail, as he always did. He raised it up to his eyesight and pushed the lever a few times. "I always hated the last one, it kept getting stuck."

He showed her a slight grin, "Do you remember how I could never change it to the right setting? It would always be either too burnt or barely toasted when it was done. I always hated that."

She gave another cold stare, barely nodding to his statement. Aaron disconcertingly gazed back at her inattentiveness as she continued to sip on her beverage every minute or so. He placed the new toaster down and slouched back in his seat. "So, how have you been holding up?"

There was a piercing silence and a tense aroma, which felt new to him. Her eyes darted into his unfazed gaze. How can he be so... normal? She thought to herself. The unnerving hatred, disgust and most importantly, fear was surprisingly escaping her clouded and overthinking mind. The countless nights of simply... thinking. Thinking about what she would say to him when they crossed paths. If they ever would again.

"You're thinking..." he concluded. "You're thinking about something... and I want you to just let it out."

There was a short pause as he closed his fists firmly onto the table in front of him. "Look, if you don't say it now we can't move on from this."

Cara looked away as her posture slouched by a few inches.

"I'm a big boy. I can take it."

She took a single, deep breath as if she was about to dive into a large swimming pool. Her position had risen once again like a lioness. "Do not pretend for a second... that we are something.

Aaron's expression and body language changed dramatically upon hearing her assertion. He cleared his throat and then breathed in through his dense nostrils, realising the delicacy of the situation.

"The nerve you have, to barge into my house...no, my home and you pretend like this somehow involves you. Do you have any idea of what you did to me that night? Wait, no...not just to me, but to her."

Her speech was interrupted by his restrained comment. "You don't think I know that, Cara?"

"What was that? I didn't hear you. You're gonna have to speak a little louder" she remarked.

He snickered sarcastically, "Let me ask you a question. Do you think I sleep for eight hours every night? Do you think I can look at myself in the mirror with some sort of pride? What about our photos? Do you think I can look at the hundreds of photos and not feel ashamed at all?"

The emotions were eating away at him. "You don't know Cara, you just don't..."

"How dare you assume that I don't know how it feels! How fucking dare you!"

The tension in the air was dialled to eleven. Each of their voices tried, yet failed to overcome their counterpart. The room grew humid even with the window fully opened. The volume of their bickering echoed throughout the ordinarily silent house.

"We can't keep doing this," she concluded. "We just can't."

Aaron grasped a tissue from the bench behind him. Cara reached out her hand to grab it from him, only to realise that he was using it for his own sweaty forehead.

"The way I see it we have two options" he announced. "Option one, I come back here to stay. We can live together again just like we did before. We can watch Rose, our Rose, grow up together, be there for her whenever she needs us and most of all, she can live her life with a father and mother watching over her."

Cara blew her nose into the crumpled tissue from her pocket. "So... what's the second option?" she snuffled.

"Option two. I leave here... today. Rose lives her life without a father and..." he stopped himself abruptly, unable to finish.

"And... and what?" she asked.

Aaron buckled into his chair. The emotion from the situation drowned out the nearby commotion from the morning traffic.

"I'm tired Cara. I'm just tired of it all. Not knowing, the silence, just all of it." He wiped away at his wet, reddened eyes. "I need an answer. I can't leave here unless you tell me what it is."

Cara could see how truly broken he had become in the last few months. She felt a shift of power in that very moment, realising her upcoming decision was of great importance to him.

"I think that..." she started to say. Her thoughts and inner voice were reaching her louder than ever before. This isn't about you. This isn't about you. You know what to do...

She replayed those thoughts like lyrics to a song. Deep down she had always known. For the first time in a long time her mind wasn't divided. Her mind wasn't torn. She could see clear as day what the right choice was. Not the best choice... but the right one.

Cara escaped from her seat and moved over to him, awkwardly rubbing him on the shoulder.

"Hey..." she whispered.

"Yeah" he said.

"Let's go see our daughter."