𝐂𝐎𝐆𝐍𝐈𝐙𝐀𝐍𝐓 |𝟏𝟖+

𝘱𝘳𝘰𝘭𝘰𝘨𝘶𝘦 |

CHAPTER 00
ZAHRA ARIEL SIMPSON
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"Do you think I could stay with your dad for a few months while I try to figure out my next move after graduation? You know I've been looking for apartments but nothing has been panning out. They're either too shitty or too expensive." I asked my best friend of eight years.

I already had a job lined up at a nonprofit focused on mental health - but obviously, it didn't pay enough for me to be pre-approved for anything in or around New York City without it being too far out the way travel-wise.

Asking for help wasn't my forte. It was one of the most uncomfortable and dependent acts I could ever do in my entire life. Even with nearly a decade of friendship, it felt peculiar to ask for her help. I've never asked for much, not even when I needed it after my grandmother's death and my grandfather moving away to Florida due to his age.

It didn't stop her from trying everything in her power to make sure I was okay with the significant changes in my life. She just knew what I needed and why without explanation. Kindred spirits.

Margot's eyes are glued to her cell phone; her legs are stretched out on my dorm room bed. She had an apartment off campus, approximately twenty minutes away, that she offered me to stay in. Still, I respectfully declined; regardless of how much I loved spending time with her, I loved my own space. Plus, I received a partial scholarship to college due to soccer. My academics weren't half bad, so much so that I managed to convince the school to cover three-quarters of my tuition for each year I attended the rest covered by pell grants.

Therefore, I would take advantage of everything this college provided. For my first and second years, I was placed in on-campus housing. In contrast to my junior and senior years, I was put off campus, which just so happened to be the newly renovated college-style apartments available. I stayed with her some nights after her nagging and begging for my company - but that was about it.

Once again, I didn't want to be dependent on others for too much.

"You do know you don't have to ask? Right?" she says in a matter-of-fact tone, making me roll my eyes. She didn't even look up from her phone to seem interested in the conversation, which told me enough about who possibly had her attention. Probably one of her many boyfriends or flings. She was right in a sense. I didn't have to ask her because it technically wasn't her house - it was her father's. Still, I wanted to ask the person I was more comfortable with first out of courtesy.

Rejection at my lowest point would throw me into a world of depression I didn't have the mental capacity to deal with, especially with what I already had going on. I'd instead save myself the trouble. And in this case, I was trying to protect myself from the embarrassment I'd felt for the last year and a half - the last time I visited their home.

I didn't know her father at the depth I knew Margot. Our basis of friendship wasn't the best friend archetype that grew up together, always inviting the other over for sleepovers. Though Margot did try often, I couldn't, primarily due to the responsibility I was handed, but she understood.

I met her father for the first time at her graduation party from high school. It was fleeting, a simple "Hello, I've heard a lot about you, and it's great to put a face to the name." type of ordeal. It wasn't until I was invited for Thanksgiving dinner during our first year of college did I really get to know him.

"It's the principle, despite knowing you for that long," I tell her seriously, finally closing the neuroscience textbook on my desk. I'd been studying for my last college final over the previous four hours, and now I could put away the stress till tomorrow. Soon I would be outside of this place and one step closer to more stressful days.