Endless Darkness

Chapter 17

I watch the bullet hit my father. I scream so loud that Josh flinches. But it's not my scream I hear. It's...Koas?

***

I shoot up out of bed. I look next to me to see Koa thrashing around. He then screams just like I heard in my dream. I suddenly understand what he is yelling.

"Nicole!"

I grab both his wrists and pin the down, "Koa, I'm right here. Koa! I'm right here. I'm. Right. Here." I repeat this over and over. He doesn't stop yelling or thrashing.

I grab his face with my hands and yell as loudly as possible, "Koa! I'm right here!"

When that doesn't work I let out a terrified scream. Koa immediately shoots up and is now awake. He looks me up and down as if to make sure I'm actually there.

"Koa, I'm right here. I'm here. It's okay," I slowly reach my hands out to cup his face again.

"I had a nightmare," his breathing is uneven.

"Tell me what happened."

Koa looks at me unsure, "You- you were standing on the edge of a building. You were looking down right as I got up to you. I tried talking you out of it but, but you jumped. I screamed your name over and over even after I," he pauses looking at me, "Even after I jumped after you."

Koa lays back down and stares at the ceiling. I readjust myself so that I laying down except now my head rests on his chest. I can hear his heartbeat racing. I also hear his breath hitch. I close my eyes and wrap my arms around his torso.

"Now, when you sleep you will always know that I am here with you. Hopefully you will have less nightmares," I softly whisper.

He timidly put his arm around me and brings me closer.

"Darling?"

"Yes?"

"I've never fallen in love before but I think I might be falling in love with you." This time my breath hitches. No one has told me they love me since Brandon last told me. Even then he's family. No one outside of my family has told me that.

"Me?" I ask in disbelief. I mean why does he love me? I don't seem very lovable. I'm not attractive either. My dark brown hair and blue eyes are basic. Why me?

"Yes you. You're fucking perfect and fucking with my mind. I never did anything for anyone before you. Once my mom left and my sister was in a coma I stopped being a nice person. I killed without thinking. I didn't talk to anyone. I fucked girls like they meant nothing. Ever since we killed your father and watched you visibly break," he pauses. "I haven't looked at a single girl since."

"Stop saying 'we'. You didn't kill my father. Josh and your dad did," I whisper.

"How can you forgive me for something like that?" Koa asks me.

"How can you love someone as broken and fucked up as me?" I say in answer.

We are both silent for a while. I know he's awake because his breathing is very uneven. When sleep finally begins to take over me I whisper to Koa, "I think I might be falling in love with you too."